Cruel Summer Chapter 11 - Identity Mad

Word Count: 5,685/189,000

Rating: PG-13

Summary: After Kurt was rejected from NYADA, we were dying to find out what happened next. We couldn't wait for the September premiere. Here is our take of what happened from the letter opening and beyond.

Author's Note: Well guys, this is such a great journey! We are truly overwhelmed with thanks. I never imagined that my little story would grow so much! The main points are still there, but we have fleshed it out so much! And it is getting even bigger! This could be a season of its own! We still plan on doing s4…Believe me, we have plans…BIG plans. (Thank you, Quinn). This chapter is a fun one, at least at first, cause things are about to get serious. Also a reminder that we are going on hiatus for a week (August 27) since I have surgery. If I feel better before, I will post.

Disclaimer time! Neither KurtsieKalanai  nor AlignedStars own Glee. If we did, everyone would have been seniors and somehow in NYC. Second, we don’t own the songs in the fic. We do use songs like the show but they fit into the story. Songs will be explained at the end of chapter. Third, this is AU so things do not work EXACTLY like canon. We try to stick to canon the best we can, however. Characters may be OOC, but there are reasons why, as you will soon see. Evolving characters, FTW!!

Thanks: The incomparable Wayne Kotke and the Gleekast family. Also, if anyone from the cast or crew of Glee is reading, thank you so much for this wonderful universe. You all truly inspire me to be a better person and writer. And of course, all our wonderful readers. So please, leave feedback if you can.

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After eating the awesome breakfast Carole had made -- well, brunch really, considering how late it was --  Kurt and Finn were found in the family room playing on Finn’s beloved X-Box. Blaine was assisting Carole with cleanup, and while Kurt had tried helping with the tidying, Blaine pushed him back into the family room telling him to stay out. 

“Oh, how romantic. My very own househusband,” teased Kurt, giving Blaine a small peck on the cheek.

“You wish,” retorted Blaine.

“Actually, I do,” said Kurt with a wicked smile. He turned and walked away with a wave.

Rachel was upstairs on Finn’s desktop. She was supposed to log into Facebook and invite the gang over, but she had gotten distracted with looking at apartments in New York. She was searching for a two bedroom with a doorman and parking spaces for at least three cars for under a $1000.00 a month. The search was a bit unproductive, but she knew with perseverance and positive thinking, the right place could be located. Of course it would also need a view of Central Park and an elevator. Ah, the perfect picture of domestic bliss was to be found at the Hudson-Hummel household this early afternoon. 

 “Make sure you blow yourself up several times for me!” called Blaine from the kitchen. Kurt shot the middle finger to his boyfriend. 

Blaine laughed back, said, “Dream on!” and he rejoined Carole in the kitchen before Kurt could make another comment. “Hah! Got the last word in this time!” Blaine said to no one in particular.

“What’s that, dear?” Carole asked absentmindedly.

“Nothing,” Blaine replied. He picked up a towel and went to work drying dishes.

Finn was sitting in Burt’s armchair so Kurt sat on the floor beside him and grabbed a controller.

“You don’t need to sit on the floor, Kurt. There are seats everywhere,” advised Finn.

“You play your way and I’ll play mine,” said Kurt haughtily.

Finn rolled his eyes. “Well, aren’t WE testy?” he said with a smile. “Anyhow, I made you a character, and I gave you some basic equipment. We can start you off slow. So that button is to shoot your gun, that one is to throw a grenade, and that one up there is to change your equipment,” he explained as he pointed out all the buttons on the controller.

“So is there an option to change my person thingie’s outfit? Cause THAT is ugly!” said Kurt as he pointed to his character on the screen. He temporarily reverted back to his fashionista way of thinking.

"Kurt, just play the game," Finn said, exasperated. As an afterthought, he added, “Avatar. It’s called an avatar.”

“Fine! Although I don’t know how you can expect me to kill things in that getup,” Kurt huffed and started pressing random buttons. “So I shoot like this?” he asked. He was playing a versus game with Finn and proceeded to shoot Finn’s avatar right in the face.

“Dude! What the hell? Give me a chance to get into position!” yelled Finn.

“What?” Kurt exclaimed. “I was just testing out my controls! It wouldn’t be very fair if I didn’t know what I was doing, right?”

“Whatever. It’s still not cool,” whined Finn and reset the game. “Okay, let’s try again.”

They loaded into the map and Finn was about to move into position when Kurt shot him again from behind. Kurt started laughing manically. Evil Kurt had surfaced. Torturing Finn through video games was so intoxicating.   

“Kurt!” thundered Finn. “I said wait until I get into position! You’re cheating!”

Kurt put his hands up in mock surrender and said, “All’s fair in love and war, dear brother…or something like that.”

“Okay, now you’re just messing with me!” accused Finn, and Kurt just grinned at him.

Finn reset the game yet again and Kurt allowed his brother to get into position, the big baby.

“NOW can I shoot you?” asked Kurt. He was actually having fun playing this game. But truthfully, he was having more fun tormenting his brother. He always wished he could have moments like this. They would have to schedule more male bonding moments since it seemed they were both going to be stuck in Lima for a while.

Blaine finished up with the cleaning, bid Carole adieu and went to join the boys in the family room. He stepped over Kurt on the floor and accidently-on-purpose brushed against Kurt with his leg.  Kurt lost his concentration and complained, “Hey Blaine, you messed up my shot!”

Finn responded, “All is fair in war and stuff, Kurt.” 

“Finn, the phrase is all’s fair in love and…oh, never mind!” Kurt said, sticking out his tongue at Finn and blowing him up.

“Hey! Not fair, Kurt!” Finn cried.

Blaine laughed and sat in the chair beside Finn. Kurt slid back so he was leaning against the front of the chair in between Blaine’s knees. Blaine leaned over and kissed the top of Kurt’s head, taking care not to mess his spikes. “Having fun?” he asked his boyfriend.

“Kurt’s cheating,” Finn grumbled. “He keeps ambushing me before I’m ready.”

“Hey, I am simply taking whatever advantage is afforded to me,” explained Kurt to Blaine. Blaine nodded, completely understanding what his boyfriend was saying.

“Kurt said what now?” asked Finn.

Kurt rolled his eyes and said, “Home court advantage, Finn. Jeez.”

“Bro, that’s not home court advantage. THAT is cheating,” Finn argued.

“You say tomato, I say to-mah-to,” Kurt said nonchalantly. “Right Blaine?”

Blaine was making a shopping list of food for Carole to buy for tonight’s cookout. Blaine loved food shopping. He liked planning out the trip aisle by aisle. He hated it with a passion when his favorite grocery store changed its layout. It almost felt like a small betrayal to him. Once he bemoaned the fact to the manager, who explained it was corporate and there was no control over it. Besides how else could the store market new products to its customers? Blaine was devastated by this revelation and vowed not to become a grocery store manager. Well, he was eleven at the time. Blaine was in his space-out zone and was ignoring Kurt. 

Kurt tapped Blaine on the leg, bringing him out of his reverie, and asked, “Whatcha doing?”

“Oh, nothing. Carole wanted me to make a shopping list of stuff I liked since I was staying here,” he lied. He didn’t want Kurt to know the plans for later that day, at least not yet. “She’s going shopping later.”

“Well, that’s nice of her!” said Kurt, squeezing his boyfriend’s knee. He turned back to the game and found Finn trying to sneak up to him. “I don’t think so, Big Boy!” he exclaimed and rolled his avatar out of the way, spun around and threw a grenade. Finn was bested again. Finn threw down the controller but grinned at his brother.

“Big Boy?” snickered Blaine.

“Sorry, I guess I need to brush up on my insults, Blainers,” said Kurt sarcastically. Finn snorted. “I think I’d rather play like this though,” Kurt added, gesturing to the screen. “I don’t think blowing myself up all the time would be that much fun. Kicking Finn’s ass is so much better! Getting you back for sophomore year, brother o’ mine!” 

Blaine mumbled something unintelligible and continued making notes in the notepad. It was fair play. Like Rachel’s shoe to Kurt’s head, Blaine was never going to hear the end of “blowing himself up.”

Finn looked at Kurt in a new light. He was actually pretty good at this! Maybe Finn could start a league with his brother, Puck, Sam, and Blaine. That would be a great way to pass the hot summer days, except Sam was planning to spend time with his family in Kentucky for summer vacation.  So it would have to be the four of them. Or maybe they could all set up an online league. That was always fun! Finn would ask his folks to buy Kurt his own X-Box for an early Christmas present. Speaking of Sam, Finn hadn’t seen him last night. Don’t want to lose any one else. “Guys, has anyone seen Sam lately? I just realized I haven’t seen him in a while,” Finn asked. 

“He spent the night at Rory’s,” informed Carole from the door. She was drying her hands on a dishtowel.

“Glad someone is looking out for Sam,” Finn thought. “I really need to get better at keeping track of things…um, people.” 

The men were about to return to their game when they heard Rachel call from upstairs. “Kurt, dear? Blaine? Can you come upstairs please?” she said a little too sweetly. “NOW?” she added with a little too much force.

“What did I do now?” asked Kurt, knowing he was about to feel the wrath of Rachel. 

Blaine just tensed behind him. “I don’t think it’s you, babe. I think I’m in trouble.”

Kurt put down the controller and slowly twisted around to look at Blaine. He squinted and asked, “What did you do, Blaine?”

“Nothing!” Blaine squeaked and stood up, stepping over his boyfriend.

“What…did…you…do?” Kurt insisted while grabbing Blaine’s leg. Blaine shook him loose and darted out of the room.  Kurt followed, but not before Finn blew Kurt’s avatar up with a grenade.

Kurt spun around to face his brother. “Finn!” Kurt shrieked. “You wait right there! We’re having a rematch!” 

“Karma is a bitch, dude,” snarked Finn. Kurt sighed heavily, rolled his eyes and followed Blaine up the stairs.

Once Kurt arrived up stairs and entered Finn’s room, he discovered his ever-adorable boyfriend Blaine, and again-best-friend Rachel, having a bit of a stand-off. Kurt was shocked! Rachel adored Blaine and never got mad at him. Kurt figured Rachel had a bit of a crush on Blaine and actually called her on it several times. She denied it, of course, but he knew Blaine made a better singing partner for the more traditional boy/girl duets. Kurt never really worried about it much anymore. He had won the curly-haired man, and he wasn’t letting go. Besides, it wasn’t even an issue anymore. Rachel was Finn-obsessed lately.

Rachel had just about perfected her “bitch please” look. It seemed that Kurt was a good teacher. Blaine looked like he was a little boy with his hand caught in the cookie jar.

Rachel hissed between her teeth, “Blaine, please tell your boyfriend what you did!”

“I’m sorry, Rach,” Blaine said sheepishly. “Please don’t slap me or throw a shoe at me!”

She gave a sharp look to Kurt and demanded, “You told him about the shoe? And what does he mean by slapping him? I have never slapped anyone in my life! Unlike Santana.”

Blaine looked down and coughed, “Bullshit!”

“Blaine, what did you do?” repeated Kurt. They weren’t leaving the room without an answer. Blaine blushed a deep pink and shook his head.

“Kurt, you do remember that little incident this morning, right?” she asked her best friend.

“Yes…why?” Kurt answered, wondering what she was getting at. All of a sudden, a look of horror dawned on his face. Blaine tried taking off but Kurt grabbed onto his arm, holding tight.

“Well, I had to work on a personal project that involved logging into Facebook…” Rachel started.

“You didn’t!” exclaimed Kurt, looking at his boyfriend accusingly. Blaine just looked down and tried not to laugh.

“Our resident gay prankster here decided to take a picture of the moment a few minutes before that delightful misunderstanding…while we were asleep,” she continued. “And he uploaded it to our favorite social site.”

“Blaine!” yelled Kurt. “Why would you do that??”

Blaine couldn’t hold it in anymore. He started laughing heartily and struggled to get free from Kurt’s iron grip. He could be so strong when he wanted to! Kurt just wrapped his arms around his boyfriend from behind and held on tight.

“I couldn’t resist! You were both there and so cute and adorable, and I just couldn’t resist sharing it with the world. Please forgive me?” Blaine said, trying not to laugh harder. 

“Rachel, do you have your phone?” asked Kurt.

Rachel held up her pink bedazzled phone and said, “Yes, why?”

“Take a picture of Blaine, please,” he asked simply.

“No!” whispered Blaine. He looked terrible! His hair was sticking up everywhere and he was wearing sweats. Kurt couldn’t do that to him! He still had another year at McKinley to deal with! The slushies would be endless! After Rachel took the picture, Kurt let his boyfriend go.

Blaine rubbed his arms and whined, “Seriously, Kurt. You can be strong when you want to. That hurt!”

“Sorry, Blaine,” said Kurt, feeling terrible that he might have hurt his boyfriend. “Rachel, have that picture on standby. I need to see the one that Blaine posted before I make a decision.”

“I said I was sorry!” cried Blaine. He swore to himself he would never pull another prank on these two again. At least not this month. Next month, no promises.

Rachel turned Finn’s monitor so Kurt could see it. It showed Kurt and Rachel very close, with their arms and legs around each other, fast asleep. At least they looked kinda cute doing it. The caption read “Bosom Buddies.” There were several comments under the picture and several shares.

Awww…I am about to barf. – Santana Lopez

My cute little sexy vampire unicorn likes girls!  - Brittany S Pearce

Klaine is out, Hummelberry is in! Good one, Hummel! – Noah Puckerman

Aww, that has to be the cutest thing I have ever seen in my life! – Tina Cohen-Chang

Dude… - Sam Evans

Toooooo cuuuuuute! – Sugar Motta

I’m taking this back with me to Ireland! – Rory Flanagan

This is totally going on my blog! – Jacob Ben Israel

Kurt was about to turn back to his boyfriend when one more comment popped up:

Hahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  My Brother stole my Fiancée! I want satisfaction. I demand a duel, X-Box style!! - Finn Hudson

Kurt heard Finn downstairs laughing his ass off. They looked down the stairs and Finn was looking up holding his phone. “That has to be the best picture in the history of pictures….ever!” he yelled up the stairs. “Mom! Mom, come look at this!” he said as left the stairs.

Kurt facepalmed and looking at Rachel said, “Okay, upload the picture, Rach.” Kurt gave Blaine a dirty look and left the room. Rachel laughed gleefully and turned to her phone. She uploaded Blaine’s picture with the caption “Bad Morning.”

Blaine was really worried that he pissed off Kurt. Really, really, worried. He ran to Kurt’s bedroom and found Kurt sitting on his bed with his back to him. Kurt had his face in his hands and his shoulders were shaking. “Oh god, I made him cry again,” thought Blaine frantically. It was the last thing they needed right now. Would Kurt see this as a whole new set of traumas he would have to conquer?  Blaine felt a new jolt of fear. This wasn’t supposed to happen. Dammit! He was just trying to cheer everyone up!

Blaine rushed over to his boyfriend and sat on the floor in front of him. He brought down Kurt’s hands to find him in tears. But they weren’t tears of sadness or embarrassment. They weren’t even tears of anger. They were tears of barely suppressed laughter. He was trying to hold it in so much, it almost looked painful. Blaine let out a sigh of relief. 

“Oh my god, Kurt. I thought I made you cry. I’m so glad you’re okay,” said Blaine, hugging a laughing Kurt.

“I can’t breathe!” cried Kurt, he was laughing so hard. “Blaine, I love you so much! You know that, right?” 

Blaine looked at him oddly. Ummm, that wasn’t the reaction he was expecting. He thought Kurt would make him take down the picture as soon as he found out about it or maybe would yell at him or something. “Oh my god! I made Kurt snap!” Blaine worried. “Crap! Crap! Crap!” 

Screwing up some major courage, Blaine asked, “Babe, are you okay?” 

Kurt brushed the tears from his made up eyes and said, “Of course I am! The last couple days have really sucked, and you did that to cheer me up. It worked! I think Rachel might be a little miffed, but she’ll get over it.”

“No I won’t!” yelled Rachel from the next room. She popped her head around the door to Kurt’s room and started laughing hysterically. “Oh, Blaine!”  she said while holding on to her side. 

“What’s up with these crazy people?” Blaine wondered as he looked from Rachel to Kurt.

Kurt walked up to Blaine and put his arms around his boyfriend. “Oh yeah,” he whispered in his ear. “I saw the picture after I took my shower, and I showed Rachel on my phone when you weren’t looking. We just wanted to get back at ya. All that?” He gestured at the other room. “Preplanned. You’re welcome,” he said, kissed Blaine on the cheek, and walked over to Rachel.

“You got got!!!” She said mockingly as she pointed at him. Rachel and Kurt went into Finn’s room and locked the door.  

Blaine was impressed. He was going to have to step up his game for next time. Kurt didn’t know it yet, but he had unintentionally started a prank war he was going to lose. “Blaine for the victory! Yes! Game on,” Blaine thought, shaking his head. He was so going to get them back. Wait! What about the picture they just took of him? His hair! 

“Guys? Guys? Umm, guys?” Blaine called, going over to Finn’s door and upon finding it locked, gave it a few bangs.   

Both Rachel and Kurt opened the door, “WHAT?” they yelled at Blaine together.

“The picture of me?” Blaine asked looking a little forlorn. 

“Oh, it’s already gotten several comments,” Kurt cheerfully assured him. “Everybody loves it!”

Blaine groaned. “Really?”

“Yep.  I’m going back downstairs to play X-Box with Finn. I suggest you get showered and fix your hair! And then I might have Rachel take your picture back down,” Kurt promised, giving a Blaine a quick hug and a hair ruffle, where Kurt found a hidden gem. “Oh look, more popcorn!”

“You should see what’s in my pants, Kurt! Thank you very much,” Blaine responded sarcastically.

“I’ve seen it, and it’s very nice Blaine,” Kurt answered back with a smarmy look.

“That’s not what I meant at all, Kurt!” Blaine answered, clearly flustered. 

Kurt started down the stairs. Blaine yelled after him, “Fine! I’m going to hit the showers now.” 

Kurt turned around and laughed at him, asking, “A cold shower, Blaine?”

Blaine turned red but refused to answer. “Okay, enough!” he thought. “I’m not going to win this war of double entendres.”

Blaine turned around and ended up right in Rachel’s arms. That was kinda spooky! Blaine didn’t hear her creep up behind him. Rachel gave him a big hug. “Sorry, Blainers, but I couldn’t resist. I knew it would help cheer up Kurt,” she apologized. She looked to make sure Kurt had gone back downstairs to play X-Box with Finn. “I sent the invite to everyone for later today before I called you up. Operation: Kurtervention starts at 5:00 pm tonight!”

“Kurtervention?” Blaine asked, confused.

“A Kurt Intervention! I mean, it’s not like he’s on drugs or anything, but I wanted him to know how much we loved him.” She showed him her phone and said, “See? The invitation is even called Operation: Kurtervention. I have it set to secret so Kurt can’t find out about it and I told everyone to keep their mouths shut. I even have the perfect song! I need you to sing lead.”

Rachel explained her plans to Blaine and left him with a new song to learn. Finally, Blaine was able to take his shower! When he undressed, tiny crushed up pieces of popcorn scattered all over the floor. Blaine debated over leaving them there to torture Kurt, something he would never do at home because he would get into big trouble, or clean them up.  His good nature won, and he gathered them all up, saving them for a future purpose. He couldn’t stick with his vow to not pull any more pranks. Kurt started it, after all! The Warblers always told him it was imperative that he win the prank war at any cost, or at the very least have the last move. There was honor at stake! 

After the shower and the ever important tame-at-least-some-of-the-curls hair ritual, Blaine dressed. He scooped the broken popcorn pieces, deposited them in Kurt’s pillow case and listened to the song Rachel picked out a few times to get to know his part. It really was a good song, perfect for the situation! Rachel required him to get Kurt out of the house before the gathering, and he knew the perfect place to go.

Blaine ran down the stairs to join the rest of kids in the family room. Kurt was legitimately kicking Finn’s ass in the game. There was no sneaking or cheating involved. Kurt took to the game like a fish in water.

“Blaine! Come play! You can help me beat Finn!” exclaimed Kurt. “Rachel can play on Finn’s team.” He pressed some buttons and Finn’s tank blew up. “Gotcha again! That’s 5-0!” 

Finn cursed and looked over to Blaine. “Your boyfriend is a killing machine!” He grinned and added, “I can’t wait to get him to play against Puck. He won’t know what hit him.”

“Less talk, more play, Hudson,” growled Kurt. Blaine grinned at them. He never expected Kurt to play video games and play well. Maybe he had discovered some sort of hidden talent. Carole left to do her shopping, and the three men passed around the controller, taking turns playing each other. Kurt tried to get Rachel to play, but she only succeeded in blowing herself up.

“It seems you have adopted the Blaine Anderson style of play, Berry!” laughed Kurt. 

“It was so nice to see Kurt in such a good mood. Maybe we are finally coming out of the woods,” Blaine thought optimistically. 

Around 4:30, Rachel gave Blaine a knowing look and said, “Kurt, you know what would be lovely? A tea, one of the herbal ones, from the Lima Bean.”

“We have lots in the kitchen, Rach. Go help yourself!” said Kurt, trying to concentrate on the game.

“But I want a Lima Bean tea!” she informed him with a cute pout in her voice. “And I bet Blaine would love to get a medium drip.” She stared hard at Blaine, prompting him further.

Blaine paused the game to the protest of the other two men. “What a great idea, Rachel!” he said with a little too much enthusiasm. Kurt looked at him like he had three heads. “I’ll go get us one! Kurt, come with me! I’ll buy you a mocha.”

“I’m busy, Blaine!” said Kurt, unpausing the game. Rachel gave Finn a look and Finn paused the game again to the chagrin of a protesting Kurt.

“That’s a good idea, Rachel and Blaine!” Finn spoke in a strange halting voice like he was reading a script or something. “I want to take a break anyhow. Kurt, why don’t you go on a coffee run with Blaine, then we can continue later. I’ll even invite Puck over. How does that sound?”

“Sure, I guess,” said Kurt, shrugging. Everyone was acting really weird.  Sure, he could take a break. However, he was really enjoying the game. It was a good outlet for his frustrations. Well, if Finn could get Puck to come over and play then he was all for it. Kurt was looking forward to showing off his new skills to Puck. 

As Kurt and Blaine left, Carole returned from shopping. Perfect timing! Rachel and Finn got to work setting up the Kurtervention. Everyone was going to arrive shortly and there was so much to do!!

**********

“So you say that I’m a massage chair addict, Kurt. Shall I start calling you a gaming addict? Next thing I know, you’re going to start playing those Online Role Playing games and I’ll become an MMO widower,” teased Blaine as they returned to the house. Blaine had taken his time driving back from the Lima Bean, buying a little more time for guest to arrive. Naturally Blaine and Kurt talked about Kurt’s newly discovered talent. Well, Kurt did. Blaine, for the most part, listened. 

“Don’t be silly, Blaine. I have room in my heart for all of you! And what’s an MMO? Maybe Finn can show me,” replied Kurt. He noticed all the cars in the driveway and looked around, asking, “Why are all these cars around here?”

Blaine ignored him and said nervously, “Why don’t we go in the backyard and lay on the hammock. It’s such a nice day out!” He had texted Rachel as they were pulling into the driveway so they would know that the couple had arrived.

“Ooooh, what are you proposing, Blaine?” asked Kurt and raised his eyebrows suggestively.

“Kurt, I appreciate your new spontaneous world view, but I don’t think your neighbors would appreciate the show,” laughed Blaine. He looked in the backyard and could see that everyone was trying to hide around the corner. Luckily, Kurt wasn’t paying attention.

“You’re such a party poop,” Kurt mumbled, pretending to pout. 

As they entered the backyard, Kurt leaned in to give Blaine a kiss. It was a bit awkward as he was carrying both his and Rachel’s drinks.

“SURPRISE!” came a yell from the crowd in the backyard!

“HOLY SHIT!!!” screamed Kurt and tossed the two drinks in the air. They landed with a splat on the lawn. Kurt and Blaine jumped out of the way just in time, before the splash of the drinks could stain their pants.

Kurt looked around to see all his friends smiling at him. Even some of the adults were there! “If you all are trying to kill me today, I think you’ve almost succeeded,” panted a slightly peeved Kurt. If there was nothing else in the world Kurt disliked more, Kurt hated to look stupid and the surprise put him in a bizarre position. Was he to be happy that everyone was here or annoyed they had caught him screaming out an obscenity while sounding like a little girl at the annual Halloween Haunted House Hayride?  Everyone looked at him, shocked. Rory did a quick sign of the cross, totally scandalized at Kurt’s outburst. Puck and Santana looked at him like proud parents.

“I think our little gay is growing up,” said Santana to Puck, pretending to wipe away a tear. Puck just let out a chuckle but completely agreed with his ex.

After catching his breath and allowing his pulse and voice to come down from the upper stratosphere, Kurt said with a grin, “What’s this all about?”

Rachel walked up to him and said, “We all wanted to let you know how much we loved you, Kurt. So I called everyone together for this little gathering of friends.”

Sue Sylvester walked forward from the back of the crowd. Carole had invited all the adults she knew who were close to Kurt. Even though the school year was over, Coach Sylvester donned her signature track suit, this time in a dark purple with white stripes. She had made a few adjustments to allow for her ever expanding pregnant belly. She put her hand on Kurt’s shoulder and said, “Porcelain, Little Miss Drama Queen called us all here for this ‘Kurtervention,’ as she called it, to show you how much we care. And I think it’s needed, since you look like the love child of Freddy Mercury and Adam Lambert.”

Kurt was surprised, because Sue referring to him as a love child of that pairing was a compliment. But then Kurt mentally went back over all of Sue’s words to the one that bothered him. Kurtervention. Uh oh. That did it! Kurt’s smile melted, and everyone else pretended to do something else. They knew what was coming. “What are you talking about? What’s a Kurtervention?” Kurt demanded while turning to Rachel and Blaine for an explanation. 

Rachel stepped up proudly, ready to take credit. “A Kurtervention! A Kurt intervention. It was a clever name I thought up. We all know you are going through this phase, and the New Directions are here to help you get through it!”

Kurt’s eyes flashed angrily. “You think this is a phase?” he asked. He could feel the anger rising. He had to do something so he wouldn’t blow it again. This time he was not going to run, at least not yet. He was going to face this head on.

Rachel tried to put her arm through Kurt’s, but he yanked away angrily. Rachel sensed another fight was brewing, and she was ready for it. “Now you listen here, Kurt Hummel! We know who you really are, and this isn’t it. We are here to do whatever it takes to turn you back to the talented and fashionable Kurt we all love and adore.” 

Kurt shot her a dirty look and Rachel realized that might have been the wrong choice of words. “Does everyone else feel that way?” he asked angrily, staring at his friends. They all looked at the ground, refusing to answer and leaving a taken-aback Rachel to answer Kurt. 

Rachel looked around, shocked to learn the rest of her team wasn’t there to back her up. “What I mean to say is…”

“Rachel, I really thought you learned your lesson yesterday, but I guess you haven’t. The Kurt you knew before?” he said, pointing back to the house. “He is gone. Forever! He was a wimp. Everyone walked over him, and it caused him nothing but pain and misery. This is a much more confident, sure Kurt. I’m taking shit from no one! If you can’t accept it, I don’t need you.” He turned to everyone else and yelled, “I don’t need any of you! What kind of friends are you anyway? You can’t even stand with your friend and former teammate,” he added bitterly.

For once, Rachel didn’t want to cause a scene so she turned away and started to walk towards her friends, who all looked uncomfortable. Kurt wasn’t done with her.

Kurt followed her and grabbed her shoulder, spinning her around. “Rachel, I wanna talk to you.”

Rachel spat, "The last time we talked, Mr. Hummel, you reduced me to tears. I promise you it won't happen again."

All of a sudden Kurt started to sing while walking around Rachel:

“Do I attract you? Do I repulse you with my queasy smile?
Am I too dirty? Am I too flirty?
Do I like what you like?

I could be wholesome. I could be loathsome
I guess I'm a little bit shy
Why don't you like me? Why don't you like me without making me try?”

He started walking around the backyard, singing to the rest of the New Directions and adults, avoiding Carole and Blaine. They all looked at him uncomfortably:

“I tried to be like Grace Kelly. But all her looks were too sad
So I tried a little Freddie. I’ve gone identity mad!

I could be brown. I could be blue. I could be violet sky
I could be hurtful. I could be purple
I could be anything you like
Gotta be green. Gotta be mean. Gotta be everything more.
Why don't you like me? Why don't you like me?
Why don't you walk out the door!”

Rachel stomped up to him and grabbed his arm. “Kurt, getting angry doesn't solve anything." He pushed her away and continued:

“How can I help it. How can I help it
How can I help what you think?
Hello my baby. Hello my baby. Putting my life on the brink
Why don't you like me. Why don't you like me
Why don't you like yourself?
Should I bend over? Should I look older just to be put on your shelf?”

He sang the chorus one more time, getting in everyone’s face, but not touching them. He challenged each one of his friends and not one of them was willing to step up to the challenge. They were frankly a little bit scared. Even Puck, the resident badass, was a little freaked out.

Blaine was ready to give up. They had come so far and he was reverting back to day one again. Kurt moved to the bottom of the steps and finished the song with another chorus:

“Say what you want to satisfy yourself
But you only want what everybody else says you should want.”

As he finished, he stood at on the bottom step, glaring at everyone. “So before I leave this ‘Kurtervention’,” he said using air quotes for the Kurtervention, “is there anything else I should know from my so-called friends?”

Rachel decided she wasn’t going to go down alone. She marched up to him and exclaimed, “Well, Blaine thought it was a good idea! Didn’t you, Blaine?” She looked back, expecting backup from her second best friend. Several people in the crowd murmured, “Oooooh.” Blaine looked mortified and put his face in his hands in defeat.

Kurt looked at his boyfriend, feeling betrayed. The one thing he feared would happen just did. Blaine had turned on him. Rather than screaming, he said simply, “I hope everyone has a pleasant evening. I have to go.” He calmly walked up the stairs while a shocked New Directions looked on. He entered the house and slammed the door shut. Once he was inside, Kurt stomped upstairs to his room, perceiving it as his last sanctuary. He had to get away. Not just to his room. He needed to get out of there. Blaine chased after Kurt into the house, slightly terrified of the new and unknown direction Kurt was taking.

***************

A/N Finn loves his exclamation marks. Who knew? Song is Grace Kelly by Mika. I heard this song and instantly thought of Kurt. Next chapter: New Directions Battle Royale time!!! And yes, I (KK) am a gamer.

Cruel Summer Chapter 10 - Good Morning Starshine

Word Count: 6,001/189,000

Rating: PG-13

Summary: After Kurt was rejected from NYADA, we were dying to find out what happened next. We couldn't wait for the September premiere. Here is our take of what happened from the letter opening and beyond.

Author's Note: Happy Tuesday everyone! Welcome to Chapter 10. This is a very fluffy chapter, as well as the next one. Don’t worry though, the angst will be back, and then some! Again we just want to thank you for your support. This story was just going to be a couple chapter prequel and evolved into what you see here. Also I should announce that we are going on a one week hiatus next week (Aug 27-Sept 1). I have minor surgery so won’t be able to sit up for several days.

Disclaimers: Neither AlignedStars nor KurtsieKalanai own Glee. If we did, Blaine would have been the same year as Kurt. Second, we don’t own the songs in the fic. We do use songs like the show but they fit into the story. Songs will be linked at the end of chapter. Third, this is AU so things do not work EXACTLY like canon. We try to stick to canon the best we can, however. Characters may be OOC, but there are reasons why.

Thanks:  As usual, the wonderful Wayne Kotke for being an awesome beta and Gleekast. Also I (KK) want to thank the best co-author in the world AlignedStars! And last but not least, all our awesome readers! And since I don’t have a clever feedback plea, I am just going to ask for feedback.

**********

When Blaine woke up the next morning, he felt trapped. Not trapped like caught-in-a-bad-situation trapped, but trapped as in stuck-in-a-place-he-couldn’t-get-out-of trapped. It briefly worried him as he wasn’t sure which was worse. Once he was fully awake, Blaine figured out the cause of his entrapment. Kurt and Rachel had their arms and legs wrapped around him. 

He raised his head and looked over to Kurt’s purple Bedazzled alarm clock. Amazingly, it hadn’t been thrown out with so many of his other things. The display glowed 10:54 am.

“Great, just great,” Blaine moaned about his predicament as he dropped his head back on the pillow. Usually, he was an early riser, but the trio had been up talking and gossiping late into the night. Right before the break of dawn, they had crossed over into zombie mode, barely able to function from a good-conversation high, and everything anyone said became hilariously funny.  All three had eventually crashed into a deep sleep. Blaine guessed he passed out from sheer exhaustion first because he couldn’t remember Kurt or Rachel falling asleep before him. A good sleep-in, to turn the kids back into human boys and girl, was an absolute must!

Blaine tried to gently untangle himself from the knot of arms and legs but only succeeded in waking up Kurt, who immediately shut his eyes and dozed back to sleep. “Kurt, wake up, Kuurrt,” Blaine lightly teased into Kurt’s ear.  When Kurt didn’t respond, Blaine started to scoot down the center of the bed to freedom. 

“Mmmm…Blainers, don’t go. You’re so comfy,” Kurt murmured, still half asleep. Blaine grinned, thinking back to the night before when Rachel called him Blainers. It’s not that he minded the nickname of course, but it was so unlike Kurt. Rachel, thinking her favorite teddy bear was falling to the floor, hugged Blaine tighter and snuggled in, and a few seconds later started talking in her sleep about “not signing autographs please.”

“Babe, it’s almost lunchtime!” Blaine said quietly into Kurt’s ear so he wouldn’t wake Rachel. “Let me get up and get a shower, and you can sleep a little longer.”

Kurt swatted lightly at his ear. Blaine fought back the urge to give Kurt a wet-willie. Nope, he was losing that battle. Blaine licked his finger and was about to give Kurt’s ear a wakeup call when Kurt murmured, “Mmmkay.” Kurt untangled himself from Blaine before Blaine could complete his generous ear cleaning service to Kurt. 

“Curses, foiled again,” Blaine thought as he gently moved Rachel’s arms and legs off of himself and slid down to the end of the bed, allowing Kurt to collapse back into blissful slumber. Rachel, realizing she was missing a warm body, wrapped her arm and leg around Kurt. Within seconds they were asleep again.

Once he got out of bed, Blaine looked at the two best friends with a smile. All of a sudden he had an evil thought and grabbed his phone to take a picture. “Some truly hilarious blackmail material stuff,” Blaine thought gleefully to himself. He was so in the prankster mood this morning. Blaine had learned well from his Dalton mischief-making masters. After a very brief moment of internal conflict, he uploaded the picture to his Facebook with the caption “Bosom Buddies.” He knew he would catch hell about it from his Rachel and Kurt later, but it was just so adorable! Payback for the popcorn he was still pulling out of his pants.

Blaine put his phone on the table as he chuckled, “Mischief managed.” He was such a Potterhead!!

Blaine grabbed his robe and a clean towel from the linen closet, and he was about to go into the bathroom to shower when he heard singing coming from downstairs. He left his stuff on the counter and made his way down into the kitchen where he found Carole pulling out pots and pans and bowls to make breakfast for everyone. She had the radio on and was singing along. Her voice was really very pretty. She looked over to Blaine and smiled as she sang:

“Good morning starshine, the earth says hello
You twinkle above us, we twinkle below
Good morning starshine, you lead us along
My love and me
As we sing our
Early morning singing song.”

Blaine loved this song! Sure, it was an oldie, but it was so much fun to sing! He started singing, or should we say butchering, the chorus enthusiastically:

“Blippy blop bloopy
Nibby Nobby Nooby

Wa ha ha ho ho

Hooby Booby Mama

Flippy dooby wawa

Early Morning sing song.”

Carole side-eyed her young friend. He was completely destroying the lyrics, but since he looked so happy doing it, she just let him go. He was dancing around the room, singing into a ladle. She laughed and joined Blaine in the last chorus.

“Good morning starshine, the earth says hello
You twinkle above us, we twinkle below
Good morning starshine, you lead us along
My love and me
As we sing our
Early morning singing song.”

“Hello, dear. Did you sleep well?” she asked as she walked over to Blaine and gave him a hug. He nodded. She touched his messy curls and said, “That is some wild hair you have there, Blaine. Oh look, a piece of popcorn!” She pulled out a piece and showed it to Blaine.

Blaine wasn’t fazed a bit. Rolling his eyes, he said, “You’d be surprised where I might find popcorn on me today.”  He put his hand to his hair and discovered that it was sticking up and all over the place and a few more pieces of broken popcorn pieces stuck to his hand. He felt slightly embarrassed. He was used to not leaving his room without a pound of hair gel. He chuckled and said, “Heh, this is me right out of bed. Let’s hope you never have to see this again.”

“Oh, don’t be silly,” giggled Carole. “I think it’s very cute.” She pointed to the coffee pot.  “Coffee is fresh if you want some. I was just about to start breakfast.”

Blaine kissed Carole on the cheek. “You, my lady, are a goddess,” he exclaimed as he poured himself a mug of coffee. He always felt a kinship with Carole, and she always encouraged Blaine to talk openly with her. She was truly the mother he wished he had.

After prepping his coffee, he sat at the kitchen table. Carole poured her own mug and joined him. “So it seems you have had a pretty hard couple days, Blaine,” she said and grabbed his hand. “Can I apologize again for not being here? I know there’s only so much you can handle. Thank you for being strong for Kurt.”

Blaine smiled sadly but was secretly pleased! Carole noticed how hard he was trying. Going back into therapy mode and hoping he sounded very mature, he replied, “Carole, please stop blaming yourself. I don’t think you could have ever imagined this happening. I think the shock is still wearing off on me, personally.”

“So what happened?” she asked seriously. “And I don’t mean Finn’s drama queen version. What really happened?”

Blaine spent the next several minutes explaining everything that happened from the last two days. He told her about the NYADA letter; the worrying about missing Kurt; the New Directions emergency meeting; the run-in at Scandals, although he glossed over some details; the mall; the fight with Rachel and the aftermath. Carole’s eyes got wider and wider as the story progressed. The entire time, she held Blaine’s hand and gave it a gentle squeeze every time it looked like he was going to get upset.

When he was done, she whistled and said, “That’s not like Kurt at all! What do you think happened with him?”

Blaine shook his head slowly and in his best grown-up voice explained, “I’m still trying to figure that out myself. I just think the past finally caught up with him. He didn’t deal with his emotions properly, and it all piled up on top of him. The only way to clear it up was to explode.”

Carole looked at Blaine with surprise. This was a very smart and serious young man. Kurt did well to find someone like him. “Blaine, that’s very insightful. You’re very mature for only 17.”

“YES!” Blaine cheered inside. Carole was treating him like an adult. He loved this woman! Outwardly, Blaine blushed and said, “Nah, not really smart. Just lots and lots of negative experiences.” It was obvious, to Carole, he was trying to brush off the compliment. This was about Kurt, not him, after all.

Carole put down her coffee mug and gently grabbed his arms. “Blaine, don’t you dare sell yourself short like that.” she scolded. “You are a very bright young man, and we’re all very lucky to have you in our lives. I think you saved Kurt’s life last year when he was having issues with David. We owe you a hell of a lot.”

Blaine’s gaze softened at the mention of his boyfriend. “You know, I would do anything for Kurt, Carole. I love your son so much. I hope you know that. I would never hurt him, at least not intentionally. And I think maybe he saved my life,” he said, smiling sadly. He could never tell the Hudson-Hummels how very close to the truth that was.

Carole stood up and brought Blaine into a tight hug. “Blaine, you’re family now,” she said. “You’re welcome here anytime.”

“Carole, can I talk to you about something?” Blaine asked. He was about to tell Carole everything about his less-than-ideal home life when he was interrupted with the front door opening. Finn came in, carrying an envelope. He had a very serious look on his face until he saw Carole and Blaine, then it instantly changed to an obviously fake smile.

“Hey, Mom.” Finn said, hugging his mother. “Blaine, dude, you need to stand a little closer to the comb next time,” he said, ruffling Blaine’s messy hair further. Blaine pushed Finn’s arm away but smiled back. Finn moved close to his friend and whispered, “Hey, man, can I talk to you for a sec? It was about what we talked about last night.”

Carole looked at the two boys curiously, but she knew it was best stay out of their private business.

“Oh, of course!” said Blaine, caught off guard. “Let’s go out back. I can finish my coffee out there.” He turned to Carole. “We can talk later. When I’m done talking to Finn, I’ll help you make breakfast.”

Carole gave a motherly smile. She put Blaine’s coffee mug in his hand and said sweetly, “So polite! I love my boys.”

Blaine beamed and followed Finn out to the backyard. Blaine grabbed a seat in a patio chair on the porch. Finn handed the envelope his was carrying to Blaine, picked up a chair and flipped it over and showed Blaine some nail holes in the bottom of the legs. “There’s a funny story behind this. I’ll tell you about it someday,” Finn shared. Finn turned the chair right side up again and took back the envelope.  Finn’s serious look returned, and he looked Blaine over deciding he could be trusted as long as it wasn’t a music set list or something glee-related.

Blaine tried not to squirm in his seat. Sometimes Finn made him nervous and he wasn’t sure if he was in trouble with his big friend. Finn looked at the envelope again and pushed it back towards Blaine.

Blaine took it and glanced back at Finn. Finn pointed to the envelope and said, “Go on. Open it and look at the stuff inside.”

Blaine recognized it as a recruitment packet. His father had made him look at something very similar, except it was for military schools. 

Finn explained, “After I calmed Puck down, I crashed at his house for the night. Early this morning I got up and went to see the recruiters again. They’re really interested in pursuing the application process. They gave me all this stuff to look over, and someone is going to call me later in the week.”

Blaine looked in the envelope and murmured, “Um….wow.” This was moving forward faster than Blaine imagined. Usually Finn moved a lot slower, almost aimlessly at times.

“I mean, I haven’t made any decisions yet or anything. I need to talk to my family about it, and Rachel needs to know, too. I feel like I’m being pulled in so many directions and I’m just confused. It sucks…” Finn said and put his head in his hands. 

Blaine gave the envelope back to Finn and advised, “Finn, ultimately the decision rests on you. No one can make this decision for you. We’re all here to give advice, but you need to decide.”

Finn sighed. Blaine wondered if Finn simply wanted someone to tell him what to do. However, Blaine knew if he outright told Finn to join the army and something went wrong, Blaine would receive all the blame. Blaine had figured out the blame game a long time ago. Cooper was a master teacher. 

“But you are right,” Blaine continued. “You need to talk to your family and, most importantly, Rachel. If this is something that you really want to do, I’m sure they’ll be supportive. If it’s any consolation, you have my support.” 

“There, that was a good compromise,” Blaine thought. 

Finn raised his head and gave a crooked smile. “Thanks, man! At least I have one person in my corner.”

“Just don’t ask me to join with you. I’m a pacifist. Except for the Dalton Fight Club, but there were reasons for it. I joined so I wouldn’t murder anyone. Well, a certain someone, anyway,” said Blaine offhandedly.

“Dude…what?” asked Finn, confused. He was discovering that Blaine had so many more layers than he expected.

“Nevermind,” said Blaine quickly. He had to be careful. He was starting to let things slip. “Don’t let down your guard, Blaine,” he warned himself.  There were things he didn’t want anyone to know about, at least not yet. Kurt didn’t even know. Blaine stood up and said, “Let’s go in. Your mom is making breakfast, and I promised I would help. Let me know if you want to talk about this some more,” he said as he pointed to the envelope.

“Okay,” Finn replied. “Do you know where Rachel is?”

“She’s still sleeping with Kurt. I mean in Kurt’s bed,” said a red-faced Blaine.

Finn looked surprised and then mildly amused. Poor Blaine, he was clearly flustered! 

Changing the subject quickly, an embarrassed Blaine asked, “So what’s wrong with Puck? Everything figured out now?”

Finn stopped and looked at Blaine with wide eyes. “Oh wow, dude. Get this! Puck just found out he has a half-brother named Jake. How messed up is that?”

Blaine looked at Finn with surprise. “That IS messed up! And he had no idea?” he exclaimed.

“Nope,” Finn responded, shaking his head emphatically. “He just showed up at the door yesterday afternoon with no explanation. After talking to Jake for several hours, Puck called me and he was wasted. Puck, that is. Not Jake. That’s when I went over last night.”

Blaine shook his head and didn’t say anything as they returned to the kitchen. It seemed that they weren’t the only ones from New Directions dealing with major changes.

***************

Tina and Mike were enjoying a rare parent-free night at her home. It was as good a time as ever to get intimate. But Mike was fretting over the lack of a condom, so instead of letting things come to a screeching halt, Tina concocted a little white lie. “I didn’t want to tell you this before, but I’m on the pill now,” she told Mike confidently.

“Really? That’s awesome. Why didn’t you tell me?” Mike questioned her. It really simplified things for him, err, he meant them. 

“I wanted to wait until I had completed a full cycle to be sure they were fully in my system. Don’t want any little Cohen-Chang-Changs in 9 months, do we?”  Tina assured him. It was a fib of course but what Mike didn’t know could keep her near to him. Tina smiled to herself. This was going to be a good night after all. 

Santana and Brittany had spent the night at Santana’s house. Santana was frustrated with Brittany. She had hoped to discuss their future together, and Brittany didn’t seem to get it. Santana wasn’t going to stay in Lima. She had debated between college and New York and had come down on the side of college. 

Meanwhile, Brittany went on and on about Perdue. 

“Brittany, the Perdue that you are interested in isn’t a college. It’s a place where they process chickens,” Santana tried to gently explain.

“I’d get to work with chickens? That would be wonderful! I’m going to teach them to dance. I could help them stay thin so they could have long, healthy lives. You know it’s the overeating that kills them off so young,” Brittany leaned in and shared with Santana. “It’s a conspiracy.”

Santana rolled her eyes. Brittany didn’t get it. She tried to break the news to her as carefully as possible. “Brittany, Perdue isn’t a place where you would get to work with live chickens. It’s where they go to…” and Santana struggled to find the right word to use with her, “end their days and then they package them up for the grocery store.”

“OH MY GOD, NO!  Like a concentration camp for chickens?” a shocked Brittany yelled. She slapped her hand over her mouth, horrified. In her wildest dreams she never thought she could inadvertently be a part of something so horrible. 

Santana was floored. Brittany knew what a concentration camp was? Oh right! She had been in Mrs. Hagberg’s revisionist history classroom. She patted Brittany on the hand and told her, “Which is why, Brit, I want you to stay in high school another year and learn to write with a pencil. You’re needed to save those chickens. But you can’t help them unless you’re a high school graduate.” 

Brittany nodded her head in agreement. She would go back to school and graduate. She had a new cause now, a purpose in life, and her heart was beating hard with excitement. 

To escape all the drama over at Finn and Kurt’s house, Sam spent the night over at Rory’s host home. The two boys shared their plans to go back home. Sam was going home for the summer. He missed his mom and dad and little brother and sister. He knew Rory was missing his family, too. Then he figured Rory would be coming back in the fall, so he was surprised to find out that Rory was planning on going home for good. It bothered Sam that Rory wouldn’t tell him why. But he couldn’t find the right words to ask him to explain it. Sam would have to accept it for what it was.   

Joe was having a great night at Vacation Bible School training. He had met a girl, and the two of them hit it off really well.  She had the loveliest voice and the prettiest smile he had ever seen. The two of them shared a duet of “Noah’s Ark” to teach it to the rest of the volunteers, and it was magic. 

 “Shame she is homeschooled,” he thought. ”She would have been a lovely addition to the choir room.”

As for the rest of the kids, Quinn and Mercedes were both at home mentally packing for their new future. Mercedes was leaving very soon, and she was dealing with last-minute preparations. She had found a roommate. The contracts were signed, and she would be in the recording studio before she knew it! She was so excited to be leaving Lima, and Mercedes had no intentions of ever looking back. Quinn, on the other hand, wasn’t so sure. Yes, she was going to Yale, and yes, she looked forward to leaving, but a small part of her wanted to come back to Lima to settle down and raise a family. 

Sugar was fretting over the news of Rory going back to Ireland. She made the decision to take charge. She called Artie to see what he was doing. “After all, he was a good second choice,” she thought. Artie was a bit surprised to hear from Sugar, but after she confirmed Rory was leaving for good (as was currently making the rounds through the rumor mill) he thought, “Why not?” The two talked for over an hour about this and that, nothing specific. When Artie looked back at the conversation later that night, he couldn’t remember them talking about anything important at all. 

**********

Kurt woke up feeling fuzzy and groggy. He felt arms and legs encircling him. In his sleep induced stupor he thought, “Must be Blaine,” so he pulled him for a nice good morning kiss on the lips. “Hey love,” he whispered. 

“Mmmm” was the reply he got.

Wait, that didn’t sound right. That didn’t feel right, either!  Whoever this was felt soft, and there was long and straight hair instead of short and curly. And there were curves where there really shouldn’t be. Kurt tentatively put out his hand and felt a face. This face had distinctly feminine features and the nose was way too big to be Blaine’s.

“Oh, shit!” Kurt said to himself and opened his eyes. He was almost face to face with Rachel. All of a sudden she opened her eyes.

“Aaaarrrghhhh!!!!!” screamed Kurt. A split second later, Rachel screeched, “Eeeeeeeee!!!”

Kurt detangled himself from Rachel and his blankets and scooted to the edge of the bed, horrified. “What happened? Where’s Blaine? You? Me? What? Did we get drunk?” he stammered. His mind wasn’t cleared yet, and jumped to the worst possible conclusion.

Rachel sat up, and covered herself with the blanket, even though she was fully clothed in her pink jammies. “Drunk? No, I don’t think so, Kurt. We just stayed up really late talking. Did you just kiss me?” she asked as she looked horrified at Kurt. 

Kurt shook his head. “Wasn’t me,” he insisted, trying to look all wide-eyed innocent.

Rachel looked around the room asking, “But where’s Blaine? Maybe he kissed me. I could swear he was here with us!”  Not seeing him on top of the bed she decided to check under the bed to be sure. Rachel was a little off balance as well as a bit groggy from waking up. She misjudged the distance to the floor and slowly fell of the edge when she tried looking under the bed. 

Kurt tried not to laugh. It was like watching something in slow-motion. Rachel’s butt went up in the air and disappeared over the side, her journey ending with a loud thump. After a bit of a delay, he heard her say, “Ouch?”

Kurt looked over the bed to see if she was okay. Rachel looked up at him and in all seriousness stated, “Nope, no Blaine under here.” 

Kurt leaned over the side and was offering a hand to help Rachel up off the floor when she accidently pulled him down face first.  “Owweeee,” Kurt yelled as he hit the floor with the second loud thump to emit from the room. Kurt suffered a face plant. The bottom half of his body was still on top of the bed, and he hung precariously over the edge. 

Kurt started complaining, “That’s the second time in less than 24 hours you’ve hurt me. First the back of my head, now the front. Not nice, Rachel Berry!” 

And that was how Blaine found them a few seconds later after he ran upstairs to check where those two loud screams and two loud thumps came from. 

Finn had followed Blaine up the stairs and upon looking in the room, began to laugh hysterically.

Blaine gave out an explosive sigh and slumped against the door, relieved no one was hurt, at least not seriously.

“Jeez, Kurt. Way to give us a heart attack!” admonished Blaine. Kurt shot a dirty look up to him, and Blaine realized that it might have been a poor choice of words. Considering what Burt went through last year, Blaine revised himself and said, “I mean you scared the crap out of me. What happened?”

Kurt looked over to Rachel and back up to Blaine, his arms waving frantically. His mind still wasn’t quite awake and he was starting to freak out. He rolled himself off the bed and on to floor with yet another large thump barely missing Rachel in the process. Kurt picked himself up off the floor and ran over to Blaine, grabbed him by the arms, and said hysterically, “Blaine, please tell me nothing happened last night! Please say all we did was talk? I can’t remember anything. Rachel thinks I KISSED her!” He started to hyperventilate. Finn just looked at the scene in shock and amusement.

Blaine gently held Kurt’s face and found no new bump forming. “Babe… you need to calm down. Breathe in...” Kurt took a deep breath. “And out…” Kurt slowly exhaled. Blaine got him to do deep breathing for a minute then sat him down at the end of the bed. He kneeled in front of his boyfriend and asked, “Now what is this all about?”

Kurt responded, “Well, when I woke up I opened my eyes and I was holding Rachel, and you weren’t there and I guess I just panicked. My mind is racing, and I can’t remember what happened last night.”

“You have to admit, what just happened was pretty funny, and yes, you kissed me,” interjected Rachel from the floor, who had figured out what was going on a few seconds before.

Kurt’s eyes grew wider than anyone thought possible. “That was a mistake! I thought you were Blaine!” he yelled, defending himself. Finn just laughed harder and had to excuse himself to take a quick bathroom break. 

Rachel twirled her finger at Kurt and teased him by saying, “You tried to rock my world, Kurt Hummel!”

Kurt gave Rachel one of his looks and turned to Blaine for comfort.  Blaine, trying desperately to hold in a laugh, said, “Nothing happened last night, Kurt. We just stayed up too late talking and catching up. You’re just suffering from sleep deprivation, that’s all.”

“So nothing happened?” asked Kurt quietly.

Blaine put his hand on the side of Kurt’s face. “Nothing happened,” he assured kindly. He couldn’t do it, holding in the laugh was just making him hurt. He let out a loud laugh and Kurt gave him the same look he just gave Rachel.

Blaine stood up, pulling Kurt up with him. “Why don’t you get cleaned up. I’m helping Carole with breakfast,” he said to his boyfriend. Kurt nodded and grabbed his shower stuff, but not before giving Blaine a kiss. As he left the room, he said over his shoulder, “I require pancakes. And bacon, lots and lots of bacon.”

Blaine dramatically put his hand over his heart and said with a fake theatrical flair, “Be still my heart. My man wants bacon.”

Kurt just rolled his eyes with a smile and left the room. The other three returned to the kitchen. They spent several minutes talking, cooking and laughing with Carole when Kurt came into the kitchen. Blaine gave one look and did a double take.

Either Kurt bought several copies of the same outfit, or Carole did his laundry that morning, because he was wearing the same outfit he had worn to Scandals two days ago. The bandana around his spiky hair, the black ribbed tank top, and black pocketed pants all looked the same. He even had the black makeup, bracelets, and Crocs to complete the ensemble. If it was at all possible, he looked even more attractive today than he did that night at the bar. Maybe it was because the stress around him was much less palpable. 

Finn and Rachel just looked at each other knowingly. Kurt strode to the counter and grabbed a piece of bacon. After taking a big bite he smiled and walked over to Carole.

“Same outfit twice in one week, Kurt? That’s so unlike you!” Blaine commented.

“It’s different!” Kurt said. “See the stitching on the jean legs and pocket? The pattern is not the same. These jeans are river washed, too. Different style dye job altogether. Also, the top is charcoal not basic black. Honestly, Blaine, I thought I taught you better.” 

He turned to Carole. “Hi Mom,” he said in his low voice and gave her a kiss on the cheek. “Great bacon.” 

Blaine sighed in frustration. He thought they had made a breakthrough last night concerning Kurt’s voice and attitude. But it seemed like Kurt was back to the way he was before the fight with Rachel. Well, he did tell Kurt that he was going to revert. He just wasn’t expecting it to happen so soon.

 “Hi Kurt,” said Carole with amusement. “That outfit is…umm…interesting? Do you have a cold, dear?” She looked at Blaine and he looked back and gave a small shrug.

“No, why do you ask?” Kurt replied, oblivious. “And thanks for the compliment. These clothes are simple and way easier to maintain. Although from now on I may make my own. These are subpar,” he said, gently pulling at the fabric of his tank top. He looked at them working in the kitchen. “Need any help?” he asked.

“I think Blaine and I have it under control,” said Carole. “Why don’t you go watch TV or something?”

“Suit yourself,” shrugged Kurt. He looked over to Finn. “Hey, Finn, why don’t you bring down that game box thingie and show me how to blow myself up. Blaine seemed to enjoy it.” Although Kurt wasn’t doing it on purpose, he unintentionally zinged his boyfriend.

Finn looked at Kurt in shock, and then started laughing uproariously. Blaine was cutting fresh fruit and let out a choking sound, then blushed a deep red. Kurt looked at them, wondering what he said wrong. He really wanted to learn how to play the game, and he thought the goal of said game was to blow oneself up. At least that is what Blaine said to him the day before in the park!

“Kurt, you are so hilarious,” said Finn sarcastically, took his brother in a headlock, and started dragging him towards the door.

“Finn, for the love of god, watch the hair! Don’t be an asshole!” Kurt yelled, struggling to get free.

Carole called out, “Language, Kurt!”

“Sorry!” Kurt apologized.

“I don’t think so Kurt,” Finn informed.

Thinking back at that incredibly tacky disco week that Will forced the New Directions to endure, Kurt remembered a line from Saturday Night Fever. “Would you just watch the hair? You know, I work on my hair for like two minutes, and you hit it,” Kurt quoted then tried to look up at Blaine. “He hits my hair!” He added while stomping on Finn’s foot.

Blaine smiled. That sounded like the Kurt he loved so much. Kind of.

Finn came back into the kitchen in obvious distress. “MOM, MOM!” he cried out. “Kurt stepped on my foot!” Carole picked up a hot mitt and threw it at Finn, hitting him square in the chest.

“Now get out of here, you big tattletale!” Carole responded. “Or I’ll take this wooden spoon to you!” Blaine flinched at Carole’s words but nobody noticed.

Finn skedaddled out of the kitchen as fast he could. Rachel just giggled, and Blaine tried to cover up his flinch by joining in.

After they left, Rachel pretended to be offended. “Such a potty mouth!” she said, putting her left hand on her chest.

“You weren’t much better last night, Rach,” said Blaine almost under his breath. 

“Excuse me?” she asked politely as she didn’t hear him.

“Nothing,” said Blaine and snickered.

Carole started putting the cut fruit in the bowl and said to Blaine, “I see what you were talking about there. That’s quite a drastic change.”

Rachel stood up and moved over to where the other two stood. “I personally think it’s just a phase Kurt needs to get through. I’m sure he will be back to normal in no time!” she said confidently.

Blaine turned around to face them. “Guys, I’m not too sure about that. I mean, the real Kurt is in there, deep inside, but I think he’s a little bit lost. Actually, no, I think he’s a lot lost. I think we’re in for a long, hard road.”

Rachel let out a gasp and said quickly, so the words kind of flowed together. “It’s so simple! Kurt feels lost and he needs to find himself. I know EXACTLY what Kurt needs. He needs his friends. Heneedsnooderections.” As she spoke, she got more excited and high pitched. She started pacing the room, talking to herself faster and faster.

Blaine looked at her, trying to figure out what she was saying. Then he looked at Carole and asked, “Did she just say he needs nude erections? ‘Cause that is more than a little inappropriate.” Carole just laughed and continued prepping the breakfast. Blaine could be so funny sometimes!

Rachel stopped mid-sentence and stared at Blaine, horrified. “Blaine! That is NOT what I said! You are a dirty, disgusting human being! What I did say was that Kurt needs the New Directions. He needs his friends!” She put her finger on her lips thoughtfully and added, “Although I can see how one could get confused. Maybe I should talk to Mr. Schue and ask him to change the name to avoid further confusion.”

“I’m not sure how good of an idea that is,” Blaine said, feeling uneasy about the idea. Kurt needed a little more time adjusting to things.

“Of course it is! The last thing we need is my old show choir’s name being made fun of, especially when I am a famous Broadway actress!” said Rachel proudly, having no idea what Blaine was actually talking about.

Blaine sighed heavily. “Not that, Rachel! I’m talking about calling in the gang. I think Kurt just needs some space for a little bit.”

Rachel ignored him and put her hands on her hips and exclaimed. “Nonsense, Blainers!” That got a snicker from Carole. “I think that is exactly what he needs. I will use Finn’s computer to set up something for later today. Carole, do you mind if we have a gathering of friends tonight?”

“Of course not, dear. Finn can fire up the BBQ and we can get you some tofu burgers. Would that be okay?” Carole asked.

“That would be PERFECT!” Rachel squealed and left the kitchen to use Finn’s computer to invite her friends over.

After Rachel left the kitchen, Carole grinned over to Blaine and asked, “Blainers?”

“Don’t ask,” mumbled Blaine then turned to Carole. “Are you sure this is a good idea? I just see bad things happening.”

“Blaine, when Rachel gets something in her head, it’s just about impossible to change her mind. The wedding is a good example,” Carole said as if it was a matter of fact. “Let’s just see what happens. She does have a point, though. Kurt could use his friends. They all knew what he went through.”

“I guess,” said Blaine, shrugging. “Well, mother knows best, after all.”

“And don’t you forget it,” said Carole, giving Blaine a warm smile. She pulled him in for a one-arm hug. “Let’s finish this breakfast so we can start shopping for the party tonight.”

**********

A/N Complete directions on how to give a proper Wet-willie can be found here http://www.wikihow.com/Give-a-Wet-Willie. Also the patio furniture line is a throwback to the very first episode! Do you know what it is? Let us know in feedback! Song is “Good Morning Starshine” from the musical Hair. Next chapter: How Kurt kicks Finn’s ass.