Cruel Summer Chapter 12 - Conversations With My 13 Year-Old Self

Word Count: 5,919/189,000

Rating: PG-13 Trigger Warning: Implied Physical Abuse (Not graphic)

Summary: After Kurt was rejected from NYADA, we were dying to find out what happened next. We couldn't wait for the September premiere. Here is our take of what happened from the letter opening and beyond.

Author's Note: Thanks for being patient guys! I tried to post on Friday, but I still wasn’t up to it postop. However, I am feeling somewhat human today, and I promised a one week hiatus, so here you are! A heads up that things might get a bit darker here, but it gets lighter, then darker. Note the trigger warning above. Can’t be angsty all the time, right? Also, there are some small changes happening in the background, but I hope it won’t affect the story too much. I will announce more when I know more. Also, depending on how things go, the rating might be bumped. Still no smut, just heavier subject material. Our boys are growing up, after all.

Neither KurtsieKalanai  nor AlignedStars own Glee. If we did, we would totally troll fan fictions for ideas, cause we all rock! Second, we don’t own the songs in the fic. We do use songs like the show but they fit into the story. Songs will be explained at the end of chapter. Third, this is AU so things do not work EXACTLY like canon. We try to stick to canon the best we can, however. Characters may be OOC, but there are reasons why, as you will soon see.

Thanks: As usual, beta Wayne Kotke and Gleekast. If you like glee podcasts, check them out! We are like one big happy family. Also wanted to thank my co-author (AS) for all her hard work. Hopefully, we can see more of her material.

*******

Kurt had made it upstairs and was reflecting on how crappy everything and everyone around him was suddenly becoming. It completely pissed him off to think about Blaine and Rachel and, hell, everybody else. “What a bunch of jerks! Who needs them?” Kurt thought. Kurt normally wasn’t a runner. “That was Blaine’s job,” he added bitterly. He didn’t run away from anything, well except death threats and for a few minutes, prom last year, but he came back and owned it. 

“Dammit! To hell and…” Kurt shouted and dared himself to say it out loud. The F word. Gawd that felt good! Kurt ran out of his room and went over to a window at the back of house, threw it open, and said the forbidden word a half dozen times loudly to the shocked crowd below. “Won’t be sent to the principal’s office this time!” Kurt mused to himself. “Stupid people!” He slammed the window shut. “Take that!” he said with a superior voice of someone who thinks he has the upper hand. 

Blaine came running into the house, calling, “Kurt, please stop!” He made his way up the stairs to find Kurt in his closet, grabbing a bag.

“Go away, Blaine!” Kurt screamed. 

Blaine started to panic. He wasn’t expecting a reaction like this. He looked at Kurt, scared to death and asked, “Did you just yell what I think you yelled out the window? Whoa! That was brave. I’d never have courage to yell that outside.” 

Kurt shot Blaine the finger and went back to his task at hand.

“Babe, what are you doing?” Blaine asked with a false calm. He couldn’t show Kurt how much he was freaking out.

“What does it look like I am doing? I’m getting the hell out of here. Blaine, just go away!” yelled Kurt, grabbing his clothes off the hangers and stuffing them in his bag. Looking around totally frustrated, Kurt continued screaming, “Where the hell is my travel iron? Everything is going to wrinkle. Dammit! I’m going to need my travel iron!”

“I think you threw it away, Kurt,” Blaine advised and his tone tried not to match Kurt’s manic pitch. Kurt was scaring him.   

Blaine walked over to where Kurt was packing and started pulling clothes back out of the bag and offered in a soothing voice, “Let me roll these so they won’t be so wrinkled.” Blaine had to look like he was helping Kurt pack to avoid setting his boyfriend off further.

He wasn’t going to let this happen. He couldn’t lose Kurt like this, not after all the things the couple had been through. “You need to believe me! I told Rachel this was a terrible idea. Why are you doing this?” Kurt just pushed Blaine’s hands away and continued throwing clothes in the bag.

“Blaine, you were the one person that I could actually trust in this goddamn city, and you turned your back on me! Why didn’t you tell me about this Kurtervention?” Kurt stopped packing his bag and looked at Blaine angrily. “That’s all I needed, one person to actually have my back,” he said as he went into the bathroom to grab his travel toiletry bag. He stuffed it in the bag and continued, “What the hell was all that crap we talked about last night, about future plans and friendship? Was that just a great big lie?”

“Kurt, please…” begged Blaine. This was bad. This was very, very bad. Kurt had lost trust in the one person who actually looked out for him.

Kurt zipped up his bag and grabbed it, preparing to leave the house, maybe for good. He shoved Blaine aside. Blaine grabbed his arm, and Kurt stopped and stared at him. Blaine looked angry. It didn’t happen very often, so he had to be really mad.

“Remember yesterday at the park when I said to trust me?” Blaine yelled. “Do you really think I was lying? Kurt, I love you! I really think I might want to spend the rest of my life with you!”

“Might want to? Might want to? I’m really starting to wonder, Blaine,” Kurt yelled back, feeling this was all incredibly insane, but he couldn’t help it. All this thoughts were just tumbling out of his mouth without prior thought. He pulled his arm out of Blaine’s grasp and shoved him again. Kurt started walking away, leaving Blaine with an incredulous look on his face. How did things come to this so quickly!

Blaine felt a flash of anger and wanted to punch Kurt but quickly decided it would be totally unproductive, and he didn’t want to be like his dad. “Oh no, this can’t be happening again!” he thought frantically. “I thought I had this under control! All my therapy just about flew out the window!”

“Kurt, please don’t leave me,” Blaine pleaded pathetically, his voice choking. Blaine fought back the urge to cry.  However, unlike Rachel, he was completely sincere in his plea. Kurt stopped, holding his bag tightly. He didn’t turn around though. He didn’t want to look at Blaine, because if he did, he wouldn’t have the strength to leave.

“Where are you going to go?” Blaine asked quietly. He felt the need to stall Kurt, to calm him down. Kurt was teetering on the edge and one little nudge could send him over. Blaine had to be careful.

Kurt shrugged, trying to be standoffish. It was a battle he was rapidly losing. He never really thought of where he was going. He was just going to get in his car and drive, drive and see where life led him. “Oh, I don’t know. Thought I would go to Cincinnati, then who knows? Figured I would start my life over. Goodness knows the shitty life I have here.”

Blaine felt a sliver of hope. Kurt wasn’t walking away. He still had a chance. He walked up to Kurt and gently put his hand on his boyfriend’s shoulder. 

Kurt didn’t pull away, but he closed his eyes, forcing himself to have the strength to keep from taking Blaine in his arms. This would be the easiest way. No one seemed to accept him no matter who he was, so maybe it was time to leave and find a new home. The only way to do that was to cut all ties. Lima wasn’t the place for him to find himself. Once he got settled in this new place, wherever that was, he would contact Blaine. Maybe then Blaine would forgive him enough to understand why he had to do what he did.

Blaine gently grabbed the bag handle and took the bag away from Kurt. He was amazed his boyfriend let him. The fact he didn’t grab the bag back was a very good sign. Kurt was willing to listen, even for a little while.

“Kurt, please! Let’s just talk for a bit. If you still aren’t happy, I promise I’ll let you go. My heart will be broken beyond all repair, but I’ll let you go,” Blaine said passionately.

“You could come with me,” said Kurt quietly. The fire he had in him was starting to fade.

Blaine turned Kurt around. Kurt’s eyes looked so hard. It looked like what little bit of Kurt that was left inside had disappeared. “Maybe.  Can we talk? Please Kurt,” Blaine requested.

“Fine,” said Kurt and walked to his door, and shut it in case people came in looking for them. He faced Blaine and crossed his arms. “Okay, so talk,” Kurt commanded.

Blaine went to where Kurt was standing at the door and grabbed his hands. Kurt just looked down at the entwined hands but didn’t pull away. “Were you really going to leave me?” asked Blaine.

“The jury is still out on that one, Blaine,” snapped Kurt, trying to keep up the tough guy image. He looked up into Blaine’s eyes and saw tears forming. There was so much pain there. He instantly felt sorry and said gently, “Maybe at first. I would have come back once I figured things out, though.” Kurt put his hands on his boyfriend’s upper arms and said, “The offer still stands. Come with me. We can live the life we always wanted to. I can support us while you finish your diploma.”

“Really?” asked a hopeful Blaine, touching Kurt’s face.

“Really,” Kurt replied firmly.

Blaine stopped to think for a few seconds. He looked Kurt straight in his eyes and asked, “Do you trust me?”

“I hope I don’t regret it forever, but I think I do,” replied Kurt. The look on Blaine’s face and the tone in his voice removed any doubt. “But why didn’t you tell me about that gathering down there?” he said, gesturing in the direction of the backyard.

Knowing that he had talked Kurt from the edge, Blaine replied, “I think I messed up. Badly.” Kurt looked at him hard. Blaine continued, “Okay, I know I messed up. I told Rachel it was a bad idea, and she basically ignored me. I told her you needed your space, to figure stuff out on your own. I should have told you. I’m sorry. So I totally understand if you doubt me.”

“I still want to leave, but I want you to come with me,” said Kurt resolutely. “I have some savings that we can live on till I find a job. Blaine, please say you will?”

“Kurt, you know I would in a second, but I’d need to make arrangements. I also think it’s a really bad idea to run away,” Blaine tried to explain. Kurt dropped his hands and walked over to the window, looking out. “When you went missing, I was beside myself. I don’t want your parents to go through the same thing. Kurt, there is something else,” Blaine said and Kurt turned to face him. “You need to stop shutting people out. These people are your family. You know the New Directions love you, and Burt and Carole are worried sick about you! Even Finn is scared to talk to you,” Blaine said, trying to be sensitive to the fact that Kurt was upset.

“Cut the bullshit, Blaine!” Kurt yelled, his mood flipping to anger once again. Blaine stepped back, hurt. “The only people these so called ‘friends’ think about are themselves. Did they notice I was hurting last year when David was terrorizing me? NO! Did they try to support me for election? NO! They backed the blonde bimbo Brittany! Did they help me realize my dream? NO! Even that bitch, Rachel, who was supposed to be my best friend, sabotaged my chances so she could get her own way. Even Will played favorites for his little Barbra.”

“That is not fair, Kurt. Everyone was there for you,” Blaine said getting a little angry again. “I was always there for you!”

“Like hell they were, Blaine Anderson! Even my family doesn’t have time for me anymore. Dad and Mom are away more than they’re home, and Finn is so wrapped up in whatever he’s wrapped up in,” Kurt said bitterly, his voice calming down, but only slightly. “NOBODY ever looked out for me!”

Blaine wanted to tell Kurt about Finn’s decision to join the army, but he promised his friend he would keep it to himself. “Kurt, don’t yell at me. I had your back, and frankly that kind of hurts. You’re not the only one hurting here! I love you so very much, but you have no idea what I really went through to transfer schools,” Blaine said with pain in his voice. 

Kurt looked back, surprised, “What do you mean?”

“Can I trust with something? It’s been eating at me for a while,” Blaine asked tentatively. 

Kurt looked at him oddly and responded, “Sure, Blaine. What?” 

“It wasn’t as easy as you thought. Transferring. I... I got into a lot of trouble; a lot more than you could imagine.” Blaine crossed his arms, bit his lip and slowly nodded as if trying to reassure himself that it was over and he wouldn’t have to go through it again. He sat on the bed and looked up at Kurt.

Kurt looked confused and replied, “I don’t get what you mean. I thought your parents understood why you wanted to transfer and, well…didn’t they handle it?”  

Blaine explained, “No. I mean not at first. They were gone on a business trip when I started going to McKinley. I was good at forging Dad’s signature because he was never around to sign anything, so I forged my transfer papers. Principal Figgins just figured that Dad was away when the transfer happened.  

“I just put on my street clothes and went to school. Then when they were home, I would wear my Dalton uniform to leave and then go change my clothes at the convenience store down the street. Any letters I got from Dalton, I just threw away,” he added.

“Oh my god! Blaine, are you serious?” exclaimed Kurt. He was shocked at this revelation.

“Yeah, that probably wasn’t the best plan, but I figured after a while the letters would stop, and when I got my first report card from McKinley, I’d let them know I changed schools. I figured by then, it wouldn’t matter anymore. They barely know I exist,” Blaine said as he shrugged. 

“But it didn’t go that way?” Kurt asked. He moved over to hold Blaine because he could tell from Blaine’s shaking that the next part was going to be bad. He felt a sense of paralyzing dread.

“No,” said Blaine quietly. “It turned into a nightmare. I got home from school and my Dad met me at the front door. He said he had left a surprise for me on my bed. So he followed me upstairs to my bedroom.  I was so horrified, Kurt.” Blaine drew in a deep breath.  A single tear trailed down his left cheek.  “On my bed was a letter from Dalton and my Dad’s old leather belt. I couldn’t breathe. I was so scared. He made me read the letter to him about missing school, and then he beat me with that belt. It was so bad!” 

Kurt grabbed his boyfriend’s hand and let him continue. “You have no idea. It really hurt, probably the worst pain I ever experienced. That includes the rock salt slushie. I was in shock. He told me I was an ungrateful, worthless piece of shit; that I had no idea how much that school had cost him. He told me if ever disobey him again, it would be ten times worse,” Blaine said and shuddered in terror.

Blaine started crying and continued with a shaky voice, “My Mom did nothing. She didn’t even come to see if I was all right. I missed so many days of school. Remember when I texted you that I was sick after we both auditioned for West Side Story? I wasn’t sick. It was because of my Dad. I could barely get out of bed for days cause I hurt so much, and all I wanted was for you to be with me, but I was too embarrassed,” Blaine finished as he buried his head into Kurt’s shoulder and sobbed. 

“Oh, Blaine, I’m so sorry. I had no idea. You never told me,” Kurt said as he reached over for some tissues and wiped away Blaine’s tears. “It’s going to be alright. Stop crying. You’re going to make me cry.”

Blaine looked up at Kurt and said, “So don’t be mad at me, Kurt. I couldn’t bear it. I wouldn’t want to push you away. I just…”

Kurt hugged Blaine closer and said soothingly, “Sh, sh, I’m not mad at you. I love you. I’m mad at myself, and I’m sorry for yelling at you. But please, Blaine, no more secrets. And I’ll never let your dad hurt you like that again if I can help it.” 

“I hate Dad so much, Kurt. If he wasn’t away so much, I would have left home years ago. I’m pretty much on the verge of doing that now. I only stay for Mom…when she’s home anyhow. She doesn’t give a shit about me, either. She told me once when she was drunk that I was a mistake. Kurt, why do you think I love staying here so much? Your folks are more of a family than mine will ever be,” whispered Blaine.

Kurt was disgusted and scared at Blaine’s admission and hated the Andersons with a red hot fire. “Then stay here. I’ll talk to Mom and Dad. They’ll insist on it. Is that the only time he hit you?” Kurt asked. 

“Well…” Blaine wavered. He looked at Kurt, not wanting to answer. 

Blaine didn’t need to answer. Kurt got it. “I can’t let that monster touch you again!” cried Kurt.

“I can’t leave, Kurt, at least not officially. Not right now. You don’t know what my father is capable of,” sobbed Blaine. “Please, please don’t tell anyone!”

“Why didn’t I see it?” Kurt asked, mostly to himself.

“Maybe because I scheduled our make-out sessions right before my dad came back from business trips with my mom. He almost always finds fault with me when he returns,” Blaine answered in a matter of fact voice. 

“Like how?” Kurt asked, almost whispering.

Blaine began, “Where do I start?” He impersonated his father’s booming voice, saying, “Your bathroom or bedroom isn’t spotless.” 

“I just thought you were a neat freak!” Kurt interrupted him.

Blaine scoffed, “Hardly. I got punished once for leaving a glass out on the kitchen counter.”

“You’re kidding!” Kurt exclaimed. He was livid.

“Yeah, we had company coming that night, and my dad was pissed. It would be funny, but it wasn’t,” Blaine recalled. He shook his head as if trying to shake the memory away. “Always stupid stuff. I can’t win with my dad.”

“But you rebuilt that car with him? I thought that was good,” Kurt asked, confused.

“It was a nightmare!” Blaine responded, breaking into a fresh set of tears. 

Kurt had tears in his eyes, hurting for his love. The eyeliner ringing his eyes threatened to run down his face. “I’m so sorry, baby. Please forgive me.”

Blaine stopped sobbing and wiped his eyes. He offered a second tissue to Kurt. “I’m so jealous of the relationship you have with your family. I would give anything to have a Dad like Burt. Carole is so kind and generous. Even Finn is awesome. Coop can be great at times now that he’s older, but he’s never around either.”

“Yeah,” was all Kurt could say, and dabbed his eyes with the tissue.

“As much as you hate everyone right now, know that the gang loves you…so much. They’re so sad that they lost their Kurt. Rachel is a wreck, and even Santana’s hard veneer has cracked. Hell, even Karofsky is worried about you.”

Kurt sniffed and blew his nose. “You’ve been talking to David?” he asked. Kurt had grown close to his former bully and was surprised that Blaine had talked to him. Unfortunately, Kurt had pushed away his new friend as well.

“Yes, we’ve been talking a little bit since that night at Scandals. You may not remember he was there because you were drunk. I know your relationship is weird, messed up, and damaged, but he really cares about you,” said Blaine as he played with Kurt’s short black, spiky hair. “He can be a pretty cool dude when he isn’t an asshole,” he added, chuckling sadly.

“I suppose I should talk to him, then,” Kurt said, grabbing Blaine’s hand and rubbing it with this thumb.

“I think you should talk to everyone, Kurt. They’re all pretty hurt, but they don’t hate you. They miss you,” said Blaine as he pulled Kurt in for another hug. “I’ve missed you so much Kurt. I mean the real you. You should also talk to your Dad. You know how much it’s killing him being away from you,” he said, rubbing Kurt’s arm.

“Blaine, I’m still around. Dad will be home eventually. We can talk then,” said Kurt, playing with a black bracelet he was wearing.

Blaine decided to tell Kurt his true feelings. There were going to be no more secrets. He said nervously, “You were so angry, and I was so scared to talk to you at times. These past few days have really frightened me, Kurt. I remember being angry like that. When I was 13 years old, you wouldn’t have recognized me.”

“Oh god…I don’t know what to say, Blaine. Just come here, please,” ordered Kurt gently, opening his arms. Blaine let out a small sob and wrapped his arms around his boyfriend. Kurt started stroking Blaine’s curls and started to sing:

“Conversations with my thirteen year old self.”

Blaine joined him:

“Conversations with my thirteen year old self.”

Blaine reached into that dark place that he hadn’t visited in a long time. This was going to hurt, but Kurt needed to know:

“You're angry, I know this.
The world couldn't care less.
You're lonely, I feel this,
And you wish you were the best
No teachers or guidance.
And you always walk alone.
You're crying at night when,
Nobody else is home.”

Kurt felt lucky. His life sucked sometimes, but his home life had always been so supportive. He pulled Blaine away and sang to him:

“Come over here and let me hold your hand and hug you darling.
I promise you that it won't always feel this bad.
There are so many things I want to say to you.
You're the boy you used to be,
You little heartbroken thirteen year old you.”

This was why Blaine loved Kurt. He knew exactly what Blaine was feeling. He continued singing his feelings to his boyfriend:

“You're laughing, but you're hiding.
God I know that trick too well.
You forget that I've been you,
And now I'm just the shell.
I promise I love you and,
Everything will work out fine.
Don't try to grow up yet,
Oh just give it some time.”

Kurt wanted to show that he was always going to be there for his boyfriend. He put his hands on Blaine’s arms and sang:

“The pain you feel is real. You're not asleep but it's a nightmare,
But you can wake up anytime.
Oh don't lose your passion or the fighter that's inside of you.
You're the boy you used to be.
The pissed off complicated thirteen year old you.”

Kurt took Blaine back into his arms as the two men finished singing:

“Conversations with my thirteen year old self.
Conversations with my thirteen year old self.”

“Kurt, you do understand!” whispered Blaine. 

“I do,” said Kurt quietly. “Hell I’m going through it right now. Again, do you forgive me?”

“Nothing to forgive, darling. No matter…” Blaine murmured as he took Kurt’s face into his hands and gently kissed his black lips. Kurt gasped at the gentleness of the kiss. 

“Have I ever mentioned that you take my breath away?” asked Kurt as they pulled away.

“Several times, if I recall correctly,” said Blaine in response. He gave a small smile, and Kurt hugged him tightly.

“Next time I want to go all ‘Hulk…smash’, will you please knock some sense in my head?” asked Kurt.

“Babe, this is going to take a while to get through. Just promise that you’ll let me be right beside you while we work through this. The thought of you leaving me just about killed me,” said Blaine sincerely.

“Let’s cuddle,” said Kurt. He was done fighting. With everybody. “I need some quality Blaine Anderson cuddle time right now.” 

Kurt grabbed Blaine’s hand and led him over to the bed and stated. “I think I got all the popcorn out of the sheets when I made it today. I don’t know how we slept in all that mess.”

Blaine gave him a sickly grin, shrugged his shoulders and said, “At least you didn’t have it down your pants. It got a little itchy and it left popcorn impressions all over my skin.” 

“I’d like to see that,” Kurt said suggestively. Blaine looked at him hard. 

At that moment, Blaine decided to let Kurt lay down first on the specially prepared pillow Blaine had created for him after Blaine’s shower. 

“Hey Blaine,” Kurt said looking bewildered. “I think there’s something in my pillow case.”

Blaine gave him his best I-don’t-know-what-you-are-talking-about look. 

Kurt reached inside the pillow case and pulled out bits of popcorn. “Must have missed these,” he said nonchalantly.

Blaine suppressed a small smile and climbed in bed next to Kurt. “Another prank gone awry,” he thought. “Maybe I should quit while I’m ahead.” 

As the couple cuddled together, Blaine, with his head lying on Kurt’s chest, asked, “Hey Kurt?”

“Hmm?”

“I didn’t tell you this before, but I think your new look is pretty hot. I wasn’t sure whether to be turned on or horrified that night at Scandals when you were singing that song,” said Blaine as he played with the fabric of the black ribbed tank top that Kurt was wearing.

 “Thanks, love. I think I might keep it for a bit. As much as I’m enjoying this dramatic look, however, it takes more upkeep than the old me. Perhaps a mesh of the two looks? I like the black and white motif. We shall see,” Kurt said and closed his eyes. He was back home in Blaine’s arms and he loved it. He would never threaten to leave again. If he had his way, Blaine would be calling Kurt’s house home soon enough.

******

After Kurt and Blaine ran into the house, Rachel turned to face her friends and said sarcastically, “Well, FRIENDS, I would like to thank you all for the invaluable help you gave in my time of need.”

“In YOUR time of need, Rachel? Oh come off it, pygmy,” replied Santana getting up in Rachel’s face. Santana was pissed. She wasn’t expecting Rachel to turn on Kurt, although it didn’t surprise her. Worse, Santana felt Rachel had sold out Blaine. Santana might be a sarcastic, miserable bitch but she looked out for her friends. “You only ever think of yourself. Even your selfless actions somehow serve your own needs.”

Rachel cautiously backed away from Santana. Santana could be dangerous when mad. That was a well-known fact.  

“Santana, perhaps this is not the time,” interrupted Will. He didn’t want this to turn into a witch hunt, even if Rachel was in the wrong.

“No, Will, I think this is the PERFECT time,” Santana spat and stepped back up to Rachel. “Our boy Kurt is one hurting guy, and all you care about is how it affects your world.”

Instead of backing down, Rachel’s eyes flashed. They were no longer classmates, so she wasn’t going to let Santana walk over her. She didn’t have to worry about high school pecking order anymore, so she had nothing to lose. Rachel pointed her finger at Santana and started back in, saying, “That’s where YOU are wrong, Santana. Guess what? You aren’t head bitch in charge anymore, so spare me your drama.”

The New Directions members looked at each other, shocked. Rachel didn’t usually act so aggressive. Assertive, yes. Aggressive, no. She always found alternate, more manipulative methods to get her own way.

Santana looked stunned at first, and after a second recovered from Rachel’s intimidating stance, looked around at the others and mocked, “Ooooh, Berry, being all big and bad? Well, listen to me, short stuff, cause Aunty Tana is about to impart some words of wisdom and you best be listening.”

“Santana,” Finn warned, stepping forward.

“Stay out of this, Frankenteen!” Santana yelled at Finn. “I’m not going to hurt your precious fiancée, at least not physically,” she added, giving an evil look to Rachel. Her alter-ego Snixx was about to surface.

Rachel just stared down Santana with her arms crossed. “Oh please! I can’t wait to hear what YOU have to say.”

Santana quickly walked up to Rachel, getting in her face and hissed, “First, you call this stupid ‘Kurtervention.’ The only reason I came to this farce was to try to talk you out of it. Second, you sold Blaine out. That is not cool, at all! Finally, if you had any sort of brain in that freakishly tiny head of yours, you would know that Kurt is volatile right now and he has to be treated with a little bit of sensitivity. I’m a heartless bitch, and even I know that!”

Santana looked around at her friends. “If anyone else has anything to say, they better say it now!”

Tina stepped forward and said, “Rachel, as incoming lead to New Directions, I really have to agree with Santana. I know that sometimes you can’t help it, but you can be pretty insensitive to other people’s pain. But I know that you have a kind heart in there. I just wish you would use it more.” Tina looked around and feeling encouraged, continued on, “Look at us. We are becoming a house divided….”

“Enough, Tina!” Santana cut her off before Tina could finish her thought. Tina shrugged her shoulders. She was used to it by now. Next year would be different. Tina would be able to finish a sentence.

Sam stepped up to the plate and although it was sometimes hard for him to articulate his thoughts, he tried to explain his position, “Rachel, Kurt is my brother. I mean, not really, but he might as well be. We’ve shared a house for almost half a year. I feel it’s my duty to watch his back, and I really don’t think this was a good idea.”

Mercedes looked at everyone and briefly thought how glad she was to escape this nut house. Her ex, Shane, may have manipulated her by keeping her away from her friends, but sometimes she wondered if he had a point with Rachel. Mercedes couldn’t help herself. She channeled her inner diva. “If I had known what this was going to turn into, well hell to the no, Rachel, I wouldn’t have bothered to come. I have a recording contract now, and I haven’t got time for all this crap. I’m outta here. I have a life now.” Mercedes turned to leave. “Tell Kurt goodbye for me,” she added as an afterthought. 

Rachel stepped back, shocked. She didn’t realize that everyone felt like this. “Do you all think of me this way?” she asked. The fighting spirit that she had a few minutes ago had started to seep away.

“You bet your sweet ass they do!” exclaimed Santana. The majority of the kids nodded their heads in agreement. Rachel looked around for some support. Where the heck were the adults? They were never around when she needed them. Kurt, who was her biggest fan as well as her best friend, wasn’t around to back her up either. And why wasn’t Finn doing anything?

Quinn stepped forward. “Santana, please don’t speak for me. Last time I checked, we weren’t the unholy trinity anymore,” she said to her former fellow Cheerio.

Santana rolled her eyes and said, “Quinn, are you sure you haven’t joined my team yet? ‘Cause we all know that you want to make out with Berry. I even pointed it out at prom, remember?”

Quinn squinted her eyes and growled, “I am well aware of what you said, bitch. I suggest you back off or I will bring out Skank Quinn for all to see!”

“Guys, everyone needs to calm down!” said Finn, knowing he was losing control of the situation. 

“Shut up, Finn!” yelled Quinn and Santana at the same time. Everyone got into the act!  It was starting to look like a re-enactment of the Nationals rehearsals in Chicago. Joe was going from group to group, trying to pull people apart. Brittany just stood there, looking at everyone with a distant look on her face. 

Will and Emma looked at each other and started to get up to break up the brawl but the ever wise Coach Sylvester held up her hand and stopped the pair. “Let’s see how this plays out. Their fighting is so inebriating! We can wait until first blood is drawn, and then you, Will, can go break up the fight. The kids will be stunned by your overly blistering hot wool hairpiece, mistake it for a medieval torture device and run in sheer terror to avoid meeting the same fate,” she said confidently. Will rolled his eyes and sat back down. 

Emma stared at Sue and commented, “That’s his real hair, Sue!” and turning to Will, “It’s not that hot is it, darling?” 

Sue smirked, thinking, “Sometimes it was so easy…”    

Out of all this chaos, the only sane New Directions member moved to the middle of the yard and screamed, “OYYYY!!!!” Everyone stopped what they were doing and looked shocked at their Irish friend. Rory’s face was red and he was breathing heavily. “Thank you,” he said. “I didn’t want to say anything, but I am leaving in a few days for Ireland. This was not the way I pictured leaving me friends. New Directions is a family, and this is not the way families are supposed to act. We are supposed to be here for me mate Kurt. You should all be ashamed of yourselves,” he scolded. Everyone looked down, embarrassed. 

Will looked on, proudly. When Rory arrived in Ohio, he was a timid and shy young man. Only a few days before he was due to return home, he had stepped up and faced the entire group, even at the risk of having them turn on him.

“Sorry, Rory,” mumbled Puck.

“Yeah, sorry, man,” said Finn, putting his hand on the exchange student’s shoulder.

Rachel walked up to the tall thin boy and gave him a huge hug. “Thanks, Rory. I’m going to miss you when you go home.”

Rory blushed and gave Rachel a hug, saying, “Thank you soon-to-be Rachel Hudson. You and Finn Hudson have been two of me best friends.” He looked at the rest of New Directions. “I am going to miss you all. You will always be me best mates. If I can get back here, I will,” he said, avoiding Santana’s gaze. He was still a little bit scared of her. 

Artie, who was pretty quiet until now, said, “I don’t know about all of you, but I think this calls for a New Directions group hug!” That got a cheer from the gang. Puck picked up Artie and made sure he was included in the knot of people. 

After the group hug, everyone started breaking off to apologize and hug everyone else. Santana walked up to Rachel. Rachel flinched and Santana put her hand on Rachel’s shoulder. “Berry, you may never hear this from me again, so listen good. I am sorry.” She gave a shudder. “Wow, that has to be the most unnatural sounding thing I’ve ever said.”

“All is forgiven, Santana. You are right. We need to be here for Kurt. Not to judge, but to be family. I’m going to hug you now, okay?” asked Rachel.

Santana thought back to one of their final weeks at their lockers where Rachel asked something very similar. “Get over here, Drama Smurf,” she said kindly and brought Rachel in for a hug.

After everyone made their apologies, Puck said, “Okay, I think the two men have made out enough. Who wants to go get them so we can get this party started?”

“We will!” squeaked Sugar as she grabbed Rory’s hand. “Let’s go, baby-faced boy!” Rory blushed and the two of them ran to house to collect the errant Kurt and his saving-grace boyfriend Blaine.

********

A/N: Song is Conversations with my 13 Year Old Self by Pink. As you can see, we use Pink songs a lot, and we still have at least two more to come (so far). We also made it a duet, so there may be a few word changes. We discussed doing a Pink tribute, but it seems like spreading the songs out work. She tells such a great story in her songs. The story is becoming more AU as things go down, but don’t worry, we won’t lose the same spirit. Again, thanks for reading and leave feedback, please!