Saturday 4 August 2012

Cruel Summer Chapter 5 - Rainy Days and Mondays

Word Count: 5,802/189,000

Rating: PG-13

Summary: After Kurt was rejected from NYADA, we were dying to find out what happened next. We couldn't wait for the September premiere. Here is our take of what happened from the letter opening and beyond.

Author's Note: Guys, thanks again for all your support! It has really encouraged us in writing more. Like I mentioned in 4, this chapter used to be the second half of 4. We are finding as we write, the chapters get longer, so we have to split them. Then we need to find a song. It is really quite fun. I wonder if this is how the actual Glee writers do it. This chapter is complete fluff for most of it. We had so much drama, we wanted to take a break. Don’t worry, we go back to angst pretty quickly and a real treat next chapter!

Disclaimer time. Neither KurtsieKalanai  nor AlignedStars own Glee. If we did, our last names would be Murphy. Second, we don’t own the songs in the fic. We do use songs like the show but they fit into the story. Songs will be explained at the end of chapter. Third, this is AU so things do not work EXACTLY like canon. We try to stick to canon the best we can, however. Characters may be OOC, but you can see where we are going with that.

Thanks: Wayne Kotke and the gang at Gleekast for being our best fans! Also want to thank Ryan Murphy and the gang at Glee for giving us such inspiration for telling this story. And lastly, all you wonderful people!

*****************
The first stop of the morning was the Lima Bean for a medium drip for Blaine and mocha for Kurt, and the men received some really weird looks from the baristas. Kurt and Blaine were regulars after all and well known among the staff. Kurt’s new look was discussed long after the boys left.  After that slightly awkward encounter, Kurt and Blaine headed over to the mall.

The ride to the mall was quiet. Kurt was still pensive about his run-in with Rachel. The desperate look in her eyes and the need to talk almost cracked Kurt’s hard demeanor. She was his best friend, after all. At the same time, she had to learn that her selfishness pushed people away. If she couldn’t learn that, well, it was time for some new best friends. Best friends like the ones he was going to meet today.

He decided no matter what happened with his dad later today, he was going to enjoy his friends’ company and maybe even spend the rest of his graduation money on some more new clothes. Blaine mentioned a new outfit and Kurt just loved spoiling his boyfriend, especially if he was the one picking out the clothes.

Blaine wasn’t sure what to say about the whole situation. He was in the process of sorting out all the different signals Kurt was sending his way. One minute Kurt was in self-destruct mode or hell bent on changing his image. The next minute, he was as vulnerable as a newborn kitten.

What to do about the fighting between Rachel and Kurt was confusing. Blaine liked Rachel so he wasn’t sure whose side to take and whether or not this break between Kurt and Rachel would be permanent. Sometimes it was tough remaining neutral. But then Kurt would smile at him and maybe all could be well in the world.

Kurt was incredibly happy Blaine was being supportive of his new changes. He was discovering who he really was, that’s all. To have Blaine accept him this way meant he accepted Kurt no matter what. “Well it’s not like I went back into the closet,” he thought to himself. “I’m still a proud gay man, just a different proud gay man. It is called ‘evolve or die’ for a reason, right?”

Through texts, they had planned on meeting at the massage chairs near the fountain. Blaine insisted on a massage session, and Kurt wasn’t about to protest. First, he wanted to make a stop. It was time to make new friends. Adult friends.

He pulled Blaine by the hand to the salon where he had his hair cut the day before. Carla was sitting at one of the shampoo sinks with a coffee cup in her hand, talking to a colleague.

“Is this where you got your hair done?” asked Blaine, and Kurt nodded.

Carla looked at the new customers coming in. “Hey! It’s Kurt! Jane, I told you about Kurt! He was the one with all the pretty hair!” Her colleague just laughed at her and continued sweeping hair from the floor.

Kurt waved and gestured to his boyfriend. “I just wanted to introduce you to Blaine. Thought I would since all I did was talk about him yesterday, right? Well, when I was willing to talk, anyway,” he said, smiling.

Carla shook Blaine’s hand and looked at Kurt oddly. “Kurt, do you have a cold? I remember your voice being higher yesterday.”

Kurt gave her a hard look, but she meant nothing mean by it, so he instantly softened. “Long story. Maybe I’ll tell it to you sometime. Hey, do you want to do coffee? We’d like to get to know you better and you seemed pretty sweet to me yesterday.”

Carla laughed and looked at Blaine. “I do believe your boyfriend just asked me out on a date!” Blaine joined in on the laughter and Kurt blushed. Carla put her hand on Kurt’s shoulder. “Just teasing, hon. I can always use more friends. I just moved into town a few weeks ago. Another long story.”

She took her phone out of her jeans pocket and passed it to Kurt to enter his number. “I’d love to talk. Bring Blaine, too. Maybe you can tell me the reason for the drastic change from yesterday,” she added. Blaine started looking uncomfortable at Carla’s snap judgment and moved over to the retail side of the salon to find some new product for his recently freed curls.

Either Kurt was not bothered by what Carla said or he ignored it, because he just laughed. “Look at who’s asking who on a date! I promise I will explain,” he shrugged. “Short story is it was time for a new look. Long story would take me a few weeks to tell,” he said, smiling. It was nice to be able to talk to someone without worrying about what they thought of you. It really was quite liberating! It was also nice to have a friend that didn’t know your history. “Let me just say that Lima doesn’t really let you be out there, if you know what I mean.”

A look of comprehension dawned on Carla’s face. “Ahh I see. Well, I’m sure we will have lots to talk about. I want to know absolutely everything about you! Blaine too. Speaking of Blaine, he has the most gorgeous curls!”

“I assure you, you don’t want to know everything, Carla,” said Kurt dryly. “As for Blaine, funny you should say that,” Kurt chuckled, “He just changed his hair style today.” He pulled out his wallet and showed Carla a school photo of Blaine.

She grabbed the picture and started laughing. “Oh my god, Blaine!” she called across the salon.

“Why did you do that to your hair? The gelmet was so ‘50s!” Blaine looked up from inspecting a tube of curl controller and walked over. This time it was his turn to blush.

Could he BE any cuter?” Kurt thought to himself.

“Another long story. Private school. Dress code. Got used to it. Ok, not as long as I thought,” he said then held up the curl controller. “Can I buy this?”

“Of course!” Carla said, following Blaine to the register. On her way, she turned around and mouthed to Kurt, “He’s a cutie!” Kurt beamed and gave a big nod.

Blaine paid for the curl controller, and after Kurt promised a call later that evening or tomorrow, the boys left the salon and made their way to the fountain for their shopping date with Santana and Tina.
Tina was sitting on a bench, far far away from the fountain. She seemed to have learned her lesson after her bizarre accident before Nationals a few weeks ago. It looked like she was playing with her phone and was distracted, so Kurt and Blaine snuck up behind her.

“Better watch where you’re going, or you might get a little wet,” teased Blaine, putting his hands over Tina’s eyes. She jumped and grabbed his hands, twisting around to look at him. “Apologize if you want to keep your hands, Anderson,” she said with a smile on her face.

“Oh no! Dismemberment by the prettiest remaining member of New Directions? Whatever shall I do!” joked Blaine and hugged Tina.

Tina turned towards Kurt and said with delight, “Oh my god, Kurt. This is definitely a new look for you. I have to say I am liking it, although I must take credit for it since I sported the same look back in freshman year!” She brought him in for a long hug. Kurt loved Tina. She never judged, and she was always a really good friend to everyone.

“Hey Tina,” said Kurt in his lower voice. Tina didn’t even flinch. Blaine had sent a Facebook message from his phone warning Tina of Kurt’s “improvements”. “Just gotta wait for Santana then we can get our shop on. You can show me the good places I can shop so I can accessorize my new wardrobe.”

Kurt sat on the bench with Tina but Blaine looked antsy. He REALLY wanted a go with one of those massage chairs. “Go, you big baby,” ribbed Kurt.

Blaine leaned over and told Kurt, “I have never been more attracted to you than I am right now.” Blaine walked over to the chair. After putting a coin in the slot, he closed his eyes and prepared to enjoy the short massage.

Tina leaned over to Kurt and said conspiratorially, “Thanks for shopping with me, Kurt. I’m so sick of going with Mike and his parents to Chinatown in Dayton to get any shopping done! Besides, you can help me find my new look for next fall.” Kurt smiled and gave her an affectionate pat on the arm. “You still can do that, right?” she added shyly.

“I’m different, not dead!” exclaimed Kurt with a laugh. After the past 24 hours, it was so nice to be able to laugh again. Tina flinched, expecting to be yelled at. Kurt apologized and hugged her again. “Tina, it’s me. I won’t bite your head off! You of all people should know about changing your image to fit in! You are the queen of assimilation!”

Tina looked at him curiously. “I think I’ll take that as a compliment,” she said, shaking her head.

They spent the rest of the time waiting for Santana’s arrival and talking about summer plans. Tina was going to be staying home this summer instead of working at Asian Camp because she wanted to hang with all of the New Directions before everyone scattered in the fall. Blaine returned from the chairs and asked since Santana wasn’t there yet, if he could have another massage. Kurt waved him on and he ran back over to the chair like an excited 6 year old who just talked his parents into an additional ride on a carousel.

Tina turned to Kurt, giggled, and said happily, “Blaine is like a little kid!”

“Oh, you have no idea,” Kurt laughed back.

After Blaine started up the chair again, Tina said quietly, “Kurt, I’m so glad you are okay. You really scared us last night.”

“Yeah, sorry about that, Tina. Lots of shit went down yesterday, and I’m still trying to process it. I promise we will talk about it soon, okay? Sorry I scared you,” explained Kurt, touching Tina’s hand gently.

She grabbed Kurt’s hand. “Wow, you curse too! I think I like this new Kurt. No offense, but I thought you were a little prissy before.”

Kurt smiled at Tina and winked. “So did I,” he said and made her giggle again.

Blaine reluctantly re-joined them and they continued chatting until they saw Santana walking down the hall from the entrance. She had a big smile on her face. “Hey Bitches!” she said as he approached them. She gave Blaine and Tina a hug and turned to Kurt.

“Hey Sexy, looking good!” she said a little too loudly for the mall patrons in the atrium. She was such an attention whore! Then she did something unexpected by grabbing Kurt by the face and planting a kiss firmly on his lips. “That’s getting you back for last night,” she whispered in his ear seductively.  Blaine and Tina started laughing raucously and Kurt just stood in place shocked, his mouth hanging open.

“I can’t believe you did that right in the middle of the mall!” squeaked Kurt, his voice cracking temporarily to his old tone. Santana just laughed and walked away. Tina grinned ear to ear, because she’d now seen it all.

Blaine grabbed Kurt’s hand. “Come on, loverboy. Seems you two are an item now! Has Kurt Hummel gone straight?”

“Shut up, Anderson,” growled Kurt playfully and planted his own kiss on his boyfriend’s lips. PDA be damned!

“Mmmm, Santana’s strawberry lip-gloss. Bet she got it from Brittany! Yummy and not at all hygienic,” joked Blaine as he wiped at his lips with the back of his hand and leaned over to wipe it on Kurt’s shirt.

“Gross, Blaine!” said Kurt, trying to dodge Blaine’s hand.

As they were following Santana and Tina, Blaine whispered to Kurt, “Did I mention that this new voice of yours kinda turns me on?”

Kurt suddenly turned on his heel and started walking the other way, dragging Blaine with him. With his other hand he sent a text to the girls:

Blaine is turned on, brb, making out.

Blaine watched him text and started laughing. They both ducked into a kitchenware store and watched as the girls got the text and started frantically looking for the two men.

“Kurt, you are so bad!” said Blaine, but subtly touched Kurt’s ass behind an aisle so no one could see. Kurt just gave him a smoldering look and said, “Get used to it baby, cause this is me now.”

“Didn’t say I was complaining,” Blaine stated deadpan and shrugged as he walked out of the store to find the girls. Kurt shook his head and followed. This new Kurt was going to be fun! Blaine seemed to think so!

**********************

“I think we’ve been ditched,” Tina said to Santana.

“Yep, I think you are right,” Santana agreed. “Let’s grab something to eat. They can come find us.”

The girls casually strolled to the food court, stopping to admire an outfit or two in several of the shops window displays. Tina fretted a little about her body size but Santana assured her that she had a nice normal body.  Santana had a thin, athletic body and Tina envied her for it.

“Do you think I could ever look like you?” Tina asked Santana wistfully.

“Not unless you have some retro DNA work done,” Santana quipped. She thought about saying a few more sarcastic things to Tina but decided she didn’t have to be a bitch. Tina never gave her a hard time or said one mean thing ever to her. Actually, Tina seldom spoke, period, and when she did, she sounded to Santana more like a fortune cookie or an ancient Chinese sage.

“So how are you and Mike going to deal with next year?” Santana asked. Mike was one of her few non-conquests before she switched sides. While Mike was always polite to Santana, he never once came on to her or Brittany. Santana considered him to be a great dancer and a decent guy but someone with the personality of a turnip. Tina and Mike were perfect for each other and would go down in McKinley high as the most bland couple ever.

“Mike is going to…” As Tina droned on, Santana thought maybe a “hoochie girl” look would improve Tina personality. Then again, maybe not. It did seem to work for Snooki, however, so who knows! Santana shook herself out of her reverie. She pointed to the health food bar and told Tina she was going to order a protein shake. Tina went over to the burger stand and ordered fries and a chocolate shake.

Santana took one look at Tina’s food and asked sarcastically, “What? No egg roll?”

Tina looked horrified at Santana, “They don’t serve real Chinese food here.” She pointed to the Asian Wok stand and informed, “That’s all American pretending to be Chinese. Even the fortune cookies are totally American.”  Tina held up a french fry and declared, “Now this, this is real food!” She dipped it in some ketchup and ate it with a flourish.

Santana sipped the protein shake and looked coolly at her. Tina had no idea how badly Santana wanted that french fry.  Well, she had to maintain her figure. Soon Santana had to a make a major decision. Kurt wasn’t going to NYC anymore, and she had considered sharing a place with him and possibly Rachel. She didn’t think she could live with Rachel full time without wanting to kill her, because Rachel was best taken in small doses. But Kurt would have made a good roommate. He could cook, clean, and leave her alone: the perfect roomie.

On the other hand, she did have that cheerleading scholarship. It seemed no matter what direction she turned, it was going to be without Brittany.  Tina was talking again and try as she may, Santana couldn’t tune back in. She nodded politely to Tina and agreed when it seemed appropriate. After a few more minutes she couldn’t take it anymore and asked Tina how it felt to be the lead girl in the New Directions.

Tina replied, “I’m so excited. No more Rachel Berry hogging all the solos. Right now it’s just Sugar, Brittany and I, so I hope to do more singing. Blaine and I have some plans for duets. We plan to sing…..”

Santana lost her again. Speaking of Blaine, where were they? Santana pulled out her phone and sent the men a text telling them to stop making out and get their butts to the food court. Then she sat back and tried to listen to Tina again. Nope, it wasn’t working.

**********

Meanwhile, our two favorite gays emerged from the kitchenware store to discover they had been ditched!

“Where’d the girls go?” Blaine wondered, still blushing from his unexpected encounter behind aisle three.

“I don’t know,” Kurt laughed. “Your face is so red!” Blaine blushed deeper. Kurt was the one who usually blushed.

“I usually don’t cop a feel in public,” informed Blaine and then pointed a finger at Kurt. “Unlike you!”

“What? When did I ever?” Kurt said, looking all innocent.

“Yes, you did,” Blaine said as Kurt shook his head no. “That one time with the Warblers. At Breadstix. Right before we sang ‘Silly Love Song.’”

“Oh, yeah. No one was supposed to see that,” admitted Kurt. “Made you laugh!” Kurt cried and tagged Blaine on the arm, taking off toward the mall center in hopes of spotting the two girls window shopping.

Blaine, spotting the jewelry store, dragged Kurt over to one of the counters inside. “I want to show you these,” Blaine said pointing to some ring sets. “They now carry wedding and engagement ring sets for gay couples.”  Blaine looked optimistically at Kurt.

Kurt looked thoughtfully at the rings and then at Blaine and sighed. “I wish we could pick out a set today and get married next week but you need to graduate and I need to find a way to support us. Plus, you’ll want to go to college, I’m sure you will get in to NYADA,” Kurt said wistfully.

Blaine replied, “I’m not even sure I WANT to go to NYADA. I feel a little lost about post-grad life, to tell you the truth. Dad wants me to go into the business but that’s the last thing I want to do.” He picked an imaginary piece of dust on the counter, then glanced shyly over to Kurt and said, “I know. Maybe we could get promise rings.” Blaine had such a hopeful look on his face. Kurt thought he had never looked more adorable than in that moment. Blaine reminded him every day why Kurt fell in love with the former Dalton Warbler.

Kurt smiled and said softly, “Soon, Soon. Come on we better go find the girls.” He patted Blaine on the shoulder and the two headed out of the shop.

“Can we stop by the massage chairs again? Please?” Blaine begged.

“One more time and then I’m cutting you off,” Kurt chuckled. “You seriously need help with your massage chair addiction.”

Blaine shrugged his shoulders. He searched his pockets and finding nothing asked, “Do you have some change I could borrow? I seem to have run out.”

“You’re killing me, Blaine, killing me. Now I’m officially an enabler,” wisecracked Kurt as he dug through his pockets for change. “Sit down. Enjoy.” Kurt fed the money in the chair and watched Blaine stretch out and relaxed with a groan of pleasure.

“This feels so good, Kurt!” Blaine was practically purring as he spoke.

“Why pay for it when I can give you a massage for free? I’ve been told I have golden hands,” Kurt said suggestively. “That being said, it was Rachel who said it after I gave her a shoulder massage before West Side Story, so maybe not.”

That got a side-eyed glance from his boyfriend. “Really now?” Blaine said curiously and slightly intrigued, “I’ll be sure to keep that in mind for later. Be aware that you may become my massage slave from now on.” Kurt just rolled his eyes at him and gave him a “bitch please” look. Blaine blew him a kiss and closed his eyes, enjoying the rest of the massage.

Kurt sat down in the chair next to Blaine and studied the crowd for the girls. Where were they? Kurt’s phone went off. Santana and Tina were at the food court. Excellent! Good time as any for a pretzel.
As the massage ended, Blaine looked hopefully over at Kurt to which Kurt said, “NO!”

“Please! Please, pretty please with sugar on top?” Blaine begged with his cheesiest grin.

“No! Come on the girls are at the food court waiting for us. I’ll get you a pretzel.”

“Okay. As long as I get cheese with mine,” Blaine pouted in reply and the two boys went to meet up with the girls.

When boys finally turned up, Santana shot Kurt a stink eye. She said, “Well look who decided to turn back up. Have a nice time shopping for kitchen utensils for your future bachelor pad, Kurt? Blaine, did you get to ride on the massage chair again?”

Kurt smirked.

“How di…did you know?” Blaine wondered out loud looking quite bewildered.

Ignoring the boys, the girls started gossiping about their shopping partners. Santana said, “Tina, isn’t this new Kurt great? We’re going to have so much fun this summer!”

“Yeah, yuk it up ladies, but I have some graduation money burning a hole in my pocket so what say we go spend it?” said Kurt in mock annoyance, walking away.

“Kurt, wait!” Blaine cried.

“What?” Kurt replied, turning around and walking back over to Blaine.

“Pretzel?” Blaine said hopefully.

“Oh my god, Blaine! You are impossible,” Kurt gasped.

“With cheese. You promised.” Blaine replied.

While Kurt went over to get two pretzels, Blaine shot a big ol’ shit-eating grin at Santana and Tina. “That’s my boyfriend,” he said to no one in particular.

Tina smiled. ”Blaine is so adorable,” she mused. “It will be fun singing with him this fall and I don’t have to worry about Mike being jealous.

Santana rolled her eyes. “Too frickin’ cute,” she thought sarcastically. She bit her tongue and tried not to say anything mean. It was so hard. They were the world’s most perfect couple, though. She always wished her and Brittany were the same. She sighed to herself. So many hard decisions…

After Blaine was satisfied with his pretzel, they spent the rest of the morning shopping for new clothes for Kurt and trying to find a new look for Tina. They were pretty unsuccessful on the second goal, but Kurt found some more jeans and T-shirts, which were becoming his favorite new combo. He also bought Blaine a new pair of jeans that looked oh-so-good on him.

Eventually the conversation came around to Kurt’s NYADA rejection letter. They were avoiding the conversation, but it was better to just get it over with.

“Sucks that you didn’t get into NYADA,” said Tina, piling some shirts in Kurt’s arms. They were trying to find a new outfit for Blaine, and he was in the dressing room waiting for more clothes.

“Well, there’s nothing I can do about it now, right?” shrugged Kurt. He went over to the dressing room to pass the shirts to Blaine. He returned to Tina, who was looking through a different rack.

“That’s what I thought with Rachel, too,” she said offhandedly and stopped looking through the hangers as if she realized something. She looked at Kurt with wide eyes.

“What do you mean?” said Kurt slowly.

“Oh Kurt, please don’t kill me. I thought you knew!” she sputtered.

“Knew what?” spat Kurt. That raging feeling was starting to resurface and he desperately tried to push it back down. This was not Tina’s fault.

“Oh god, this is not good,” said Tina to herself, wringing her hands.

Kurt put his hand on her arm, trying to be reassuring. “Tina, it’s fine. I’m not mad at you. Can you tell me what you meant with Rachel?” he said with his most calming voice. He desperately needed to know what she meant and didn’t want to frighten her into silence.

“I th-thought you knew,” Tina said with a slight stutter, which usually happened when she was stressed. “R-rachel and I w-went to visit Madame Thibideaux and Rachel t-tried to convince C-carmen to give her another ch-chance.”

Kurt could feel the blood pressure rise in his face. “And did she mention me or my audition at all in this little visit?” he asked a little too calmly.

“I d-don’t remember. Kurt, are you mad at me?” she said, grabbing his arms.

“No Tina, I’m not mad at you,” he said as he forced a smile and gave her a hug. No, it wasn’t Tina he was mad at. It was another brunette and this brunette in question was engaged to his brother. He looked to the entrance of the store. “Can you tell Blaine I went to the little boys room?” He turned and left.

Tina sat on the bench by the dressing rooms and started to cry. “Blaine, I think I messed up.”

Blaine called out to her. “Why?” He had a sinking feeling something was wrong and quickly changed back into his own clothes. He looked back at the shirt he had taken off and feeling a little torn, sighed. He liked it and, well, now was not the time to buy it.  He took it to the return pile and went over to where Tina was on the bench.

 “Tina, what’s wrong?” he said as he looked around the store. Kurt was nowhere to be found. He was worried that Kurt has yelled at her or done something to upset her.

“He looked so mad, Blaine. I shouldn’t have said anything. I thought he knew,” she said with a fresh bout of tears. “I told him about the trip Rachel and I took to see the NYADA recruiter. He looked so mad, then he calmed down and left. He said he was going to the restroom.”

Dammit! Blaine knew Kurt wasn’t going to the restroom. Kurt was going somewhere to calm down.

Blaine sighed and said, “There was a shirt I liked. Let me pay for it and we can wait for Kurt outside, okay?” Tina nodded tearfully. He went back and collected the shirt from the dressing room return area. At the same time he took advantage of this little free time from Tina to send off a quick message to Santana and then one to Kurt:

Babe, please don’t do this. You are frustrating me. 

After paying for the shirt, Blaine and Tina went to the chairs outside of the store to wait for Santana and Kurt. Blaine was getting a little concerned when Kurt didn’t answer. His boyfriend couldn’t do this again. Last night was absolute agony, and it was probably the most scared Blaine had ever been. Between the worrying and the waiting, Blaine wondered how parents of missing kids did it. It was killing Blaine. He was going to have to sit down with Kurt and explain that this can’t happen anymore. Blaine’s phone vibrated and he checked to see that it was Santana.

Kurt just walked by me and took off outside. Pouring rain.

“You gotta be kidding me!” yelled Blaine, attracting attention from other shoppers. A little quieter he said to Tina, who was still sniffling, “Kurt left the mall. He is doing this again. NOW I am going to kill him! Goddammit, why won’t he talk to us?” he said, putting his head in his hands. He just prayed it wasn’t going to be a repeat of last night.

*****

Kurt walked. It was pouring rain and he was soaked to the skin, but he didn’t care. In fact, it was helping him calm down. He had to get away; had to be alone to get lost in his thoughts.
The source of his grief? Rachel Berry. Again. He had been almost ready to forgive her, maybe talk things out. However, after this most recent piece of news from Tina, he would be happy if he never saw her again. Unfortunately, she was engaged to his moron of a brother so he would have to see her at family gatherings.

Might as well get used to being alone,” he thought sadly as he walked. Pity party time, dammit! He’d earned the right. The water from the puddles had seeped into his sneakers so his socks were soaked as well. His makeup ran, but he just didn’t care anymore. It masked the tears falling down his face.

All of a sudden his anger vanished and was replaced with deep sadness. He was about to lose everything he treasured. Even Blaine was going to leave him because of his bad behavior. He came to a playground and went to the swing. He just needed a good cry, then he would go back to face the music. As the rain fell, he sat on the swing and put his head against the chain. He began to sing:

“Talkin' to myself and feelin' old
Sometimes I'd like to quit
Nothing ever seems to fit
Hangin' around
Nothing to do but frown
Rainy Days and Mondays always get me down.”

After swinging for a couple minutes, he left the park and continued walking. He felt his phone vibrate, but just ignored it. He would text Blaine when he was done walking, whenever that was. He needed to figure out these feelings he was experiencing. He continued the song.

“What I've got they used to call the blues
Nothin' is really wrong
Feelin' like I don't belong
Walkin' around
Some kind of lonely clown
Rainy Days and Mondays always get me down.”

He was in a suburban neighborhood and there was very light traffic so he sat on the curb of a cul-de-sac. He thought of Blaine. Sweet, loving Blaine. Kurt really didn’t deserve him. He pulled out his phone to send Blaine a text, asking to be picked up. Then he waited as he sang:

“Funny but it seems I always wind up here with you
Nice to know somebody loves me
Funny but it seems that it's the only thing to do
Run and find the one who loves me.”

As he waited, he thought about what he was going to say to Blaine. He didn’t think asking forgiveness was going to work this time. He also thought about Rachel and what he was going to say to her. Either way, he was going to lose her, too. And if he lost her, he lost Finn, and maybe even his parents.

“What I feel has come and gone before
No need to talk it out
We know what it's all about
Hangin' around
Nothing to do but frown
Rainy Days and Mondays always get me down”

He couldn’t do it. He couldn’t handle them all leaving him. There was only one thing to do. He had to push them away. Their lives would go on, and he would move on too. Eventually. He wrapped his arms around his knees and started sobbing. It was how Blaine found him 10 minutes later.

*****

When Blaine got the text from Kurt to pick him up, he was talking frantically with Tina and Santana. He wasn’t going to get anyone else involved this time. He was also pretty pissed off and would have to sit down and have a serious talk with Kurt about his recent behavior. He wasn’t sure if he could continue taking the additional stress of Kurt’s disappearing. Blaine loved him very much, but Kurt seemed hell bent on pushing everyone away. Blaine wasn’t going to let it happen, at least not with him.

Blaine grabbed his and Kurt’s shopping bags and hugged the two girls goodbye. Blaine rushed to his car and set his GPS for the address Kurt texted him. As soon as he got his hands on him, Blaine would kick his boyfriend’s butt for scaring him again!

It was raining pretty hard, so all Blaine saw at that address was a small lump near the curb. As he got closer he saw it was Kurt, curled up in a ball, sobbing. He parked his car and ran over to where Kurt sat. Any anger Blaine had for his boyfriend evaporated and he sat on the curb beside him.

Kurt looked up and saw Blaine, curls flattened from the rain. “I’m so sorry Blaine, I just needed to get out of there.”

Blaine wrapped his arms around his boyfriend not caring if the rain soaked him. “Kurt, you gotta stop doing this. You’re going to give me an ulcer,” Blaine said and gave Kurt a slight smile in an attempt to cheer his boyfriend up. It just made him cry harder. Kurt had a lot of pent up emotions, and it was best if he just let it out.

Blaine pulled him closer and spoke quietly until the tears started to subside. Once Kurt was calm enough to walk, he put him in the car and just sat there, holding his hand. “Are you ok now?” Blaine asked worriedly.

“No Blaine, I’m sorry. I’m not fine, and I’m not sure when I will be. I need to talk to Rachel, right away,” he said, squeezing Blaine’s hand. “After that, I promise we can talk it out. I also promise I won’t take off again. I’m not being fair to you at all.”

“That’s all I ask, babe. I know things are messed up for you right now, but we will get through this together, okay?” said Blaine, leaning over to give Kurt a gentle kiss. He then grabbed a box of tissues from the back seat and handed it to Kurt to clean up the running makeup.

The ride home was in silent contemplation. Blaine just wanted to hold Kurt, protect him from the future. It was just not possible anymore. Blaine would support Kurt and be there when the dust settled. It was the best Blaine knew how to do for his Kurt because Blaine felt lost, too.

*****
A/N Side note- Carefully re-watch the very beginning of the song “Silly Love Songs” during the “Silly Love Songs” episode. Song is "Rainy Days and Mondays" from the Carpenters. I felt that portrayed Kurt's feelings perfectly. Poor boy is all over the place!!!

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